Now, I don’t subscribe to any version of “it’s meant to be” in AdoptionLand. I was not destined to be a birthmother and lose my child unnecessary just to make someone else’s dreams come true, but there are silver linings to this life I have now. If I have to be a birthmother, I am a pretty damn happy one. Since I cannot change my past, all the hurt and sadness an anger have a healthy direction to go in.
A Premier in Pretty Colors for Dumb Politician About a week ago, I was gifted with a link to a study published in 2010 called Giving Birth to a “Rapist’s Child”: A Discussion and Analysis of the Limited Legal Protections Afforded to Women Who Become Mothers Through Rape by Shauna R. Prewitt. Thank you, Paula for sending me the link! Considering the recent discussions in the media regarding “forcible rape”…
What the date tells me above is what I already know. If you are writing about adoption, then the word adoption needs to be used. And if one is writing about issues in adoption that pertain to being a mother who relinquished, then I want those 1/3 a million monthly searches to have a chance of finding things here and that means using the word birthmother. I won’t call you one, but I’m going to write with it.
No matter how much he was wanted and loved, if it was not me who was pregnant and scared, then they would have gladly taken the next child available. Nobody misses the ex boyfriend that they didn’t date or the fantasy kids in a marriage that never was. And they would not miss my son that never was either.
There is always someone who says that they could never ever do it no matter what. Maybe it is a way of deflecting judgment, but I understand the sentiment. It comes back down to the pure horror at that thought that IGAVEMYBABYAWAY. People aren’t meant to do it. It’s not natural.
Now all in one place; a simple chart and map to see where each US state stands in regard to restoring the civil rights of adopted adults.
Once again, the feelings of community, accomplishment and even the snail’s pace of progress in Adoptee Rights filled my heart and soul with renewed vigor and purpose. Plus, again, one of the only good aspect of this adoption journey has been the wonderful people I have been blessed to know, work with, and call my friends.
We knew there were bad storms about as Cassi reported driving through them in Iowa. I have seen some huge thunderstorms in my life, but nothing like this. This was the same storm cell that made them evacuate Lalapalooza in Chicago yesterday. I knew it was bad. I knew we were in tornado country. I watch storm chasers. I know what hail and cloud hooks and circular wind patterns mean.