February 2013

Adoptee Rights, Cultural Views on Adoption February 16, 2013

About Adoptee Rights: An Open Letter to the News Media

These stories are not isolated. Various members of the adoption community have created vast clearing houses of these images on the many social media sites form Facebook, to Pinterest, to Tumbler where they are tweeted, shared, and hopefully, maybe, find their way to the one person who could provide clues about their origins. We tirelessly share and promote our fellow Adoptionland members and pray that they find those whom they seek. There are over a hundred images like this with the numbers growing daily.

Inside Out Adoption Healing

Adoption Events February 15, 2013

Inside Out Adoption Healing Seminar CA

WHO: PACT: Inside Out Adoption and the Mixed Roots Foundation
WHEN: Sunday, March 10, 2013 10:00am until 6:00pm
WHERE:American Red Cross Center, 712 5th Avenue, San Rafael, CA 94901
WEBSITE: Inside Out Adoption
BONUS: Make it an Adoption Weekend! Go to PACT’s Adoption Conference on the Sat and this on Sun!

A Birthmothers Life, Guest Posts February 14, 2013

A Relinquishing Mother’s Voice

All these years have passed in a blink of an eye. It really does not seem that long ago. Growing up in Utah; the year is 1988. I am trying hard to remember my son’s birthday. Gasping at the thought I could have forgotten it. This has to be a temporary block. I close my eyes and take a deep breath. Picturing his little plastic wrist band from the hospital neatly placed in a little silver cardboard Nordstrom jewelry box. It is hidden somewhere with my life’s collection of furniture and house hold items in a lonely storage unit. I focus in on it and it comes back to me. I know for sure it was 1988 either March or April. The 18th of April stands out the most. No, I remember it is March 18th 1988. Yes, his Birthday.

Missouri Adoptee Rights Legisaltion and OBC access

Adoptee Rights, Community February 12, 2013

Missouri Adoption Legislation HB 252: Letters Needed Stat

I was alerted the other day that Missouri has new adoption legislation in the House of Representatives. While we like to see adoption laws updated, there are a few issues with HB 252. While the contact preferences for OBC access are often included in any Adoptee Rights legislation in order to make the legislators feel warm and cozy, allowing one party to deny another their legal documentation is not treating ALL adoptees equally.There is also a portion of the bill having to do with Open Adoption Agreements. In essence, the issue is not that they are saying that there can be enforceable open adoption agreements, it is in the enforcement aspect that the language gets a bit too vague.

Adoptee Rights, Community, Searches February 8, 2013

Collecting the Adoptees and Families Searching Images on Facebook

This is one of those times when I am asking for your help on a project. It was barely two weeks ago when Facebook started exploding with the Adoptee Searching Picture memes. Though I know we all tried to keep up and share like crazy cakes, it’s proving to be a difficult task! I was trying to share all the images of Adoptees begging for help finding their families, but I quickly had the longest blog post on the east coast. And then, I remembered Listly!

Another good day for an adoption scam

Community, Cultural Views on Adoption February 7, 2013

What We Can Learn from Real Life Juno XO

The justification of adoption relinquishment was out in full force. You would think with all these people caring about her making the “right” choice, there would be more cries of concern questioning these adoption practices that pushed the known boundaries of even the most common adoption industry tactics used to separate mothers and children. How can she be “brave” if we don’t really even know the first thing about this girl? If her earlier, now removed tweets, were any indication upon the thought patterns of her choice, she was obviously immature and acting like this whole pregnancy was about as exciting as a trip to Disneyworld.

Guest Posts February 5, 2013

Reunion Opened My Eyes to the Horrors of Adoption

Basically I did what my mother told me to do. I took her choice and made it my own. I trusted her judgment and followed it implicitly. I bought the big fat lie about adoption and gobbled it up as if it was the way and the truth and the light. I didn’t look back. Sure, privately I thought about my daughter. I missed her. I prayed for her. I hoped her ‘Disney’ family was everything it was promised to be. When someone asked if I had kids my reply was, “No, I’m not married yet”. I stuffed my feelings down so far I didn’t realize they were there. I didn’t realize that I was suffering. I still bought that adoption was a good thing for my daughter. And that basic premise was ludicrous.

The Fight to Free Adoption Records

Adoptee Rights February 4, 2013

Adoptee Rights Bills to Support in 2013

New York Adoptee Rights billsFollow your state group on Facebook and Twitter or sign up for their mailing lists and when they ask you to do something, just do it! Send your letter, make a comment saying you did, and share the post to your own networks, The only way we will ever restore the civil rights of our friends and children is if we work on their doggedly and with purpose together.

if you hear the pain in a woman's voice, and choose to shut it out....that says something about you. it says nothing about the voice you choose not to hear

Cultural Views on Adoption, Rants and Raves, Relinquishment February 4, 2013

Infertility Does NOT Give You the Right to Adopt!

The latest batch of pro-adoption propaganda, “What’s Mine is Yours”, by Katherine Nelson and Deanna Harper, has set a “beautiful” song that highlights the pain and suffering of infertility while promoting adoption and glorifying relinquishment. But with this song and the simplification and romanticism made of the relinquishing mother, Katherine Nelson leaves out millions of real mothers who have suffered a real loss of living, breathing children, many now gown adults. And often this trauma was inflicted by the hands who those claim to want others to understand; women who should be able to appreciate the true longing to be mothers. She promotes a false cure, a band aide, in adoption, by glorifying the very need that claimed so many of our children.

No guarentee that adopted kids will be happy.

Before Making an Adoption Plan, Relinquishment February 1, 2013

The Myth of the Happy Adoptee

When we are pregnant, we don’t pump our own gas or dye our hair. We stop smoking and drinking and eat right. We watch our medications, don’t eat sushi, go in hot tubs or ride roller coasters. There is a mass of other “don’ts’ that I forget since it’s been a while, but I think even goat cheese is “bad” when you are pregnant now. Bottom line, we do not do all these that MIGHT somehow endanger our babies. Even if it’s like .00096% of all pregnant women who eat unprocessed cheese get the weird amoeba that could cause blindness in the fetus, we don’t take that chance. So why are we encouraging mothers, who really do NOT have to relinquish to endanger their babies with maternal separation?

Research into adoption surrender documents

Adoption Research & Statistics February 1, 2013

Adoption as a Risk Factor for Attempted Suicide During Adolescence

The results of this study indicate that attempted suicide is more common among adolescents who live with adoptive parents than among adolescents who live with biological parents. It support the primary hypothesis that adoption is associated with attempted suicide but do not support the secondary hypothesis that the association is mediated by impulsivity. The study results do support the third hypothesis that family connectedness decreases the risk of suicidal behavior regardless of adolescent adoptive or nonadoptive status.