A Good Birthmom

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October 26, 2011

 

How to Describe Life as BirthMother?

I love it when someone else reaches inside and pulls out their heart to show us. This is a good read. Well done.

This part:

“…it was too hard for her to feel so much, and she has let go now. We know each other, but we pretend not to feel anything. She is there, but impenetrable.
I have vowed to be different. To be strong enough for my son and for me. I have promised myself that I won’t let go, I will feel it all – pain, loneliness, loss, and along with it, immeasurable love. But I wonder. What does all of this mean to him? How do I risk so much to enter his world with all the love I have for him, so that he may feel it… and yet careful not to intrude or make a mistake.” 
…………………………………..so perfectly describes the tight line that truly defines this line that we try to walk. Risk all to truly feel it, or risk all to not feel. It’s only a question of which way we do fall.
So incredibly moving, haunting and sad; many, I feel, will resonate.
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About the Author

Claudia Corrigan DArcy
Claudia Corrigan DArcy
Claudia Corrigan D’Arcy has been online and involved in the adoption community since early in 2001. Blogging since 2005, her website Musings of the Lame has become a much needed road map for many mothers who relinquished, adoptees who long to be heard, and adoptive parents who seek understanding. She is also an activist and avid supporter of Adoptee Rights and fights for nationwide birth certificate access for all adoptees with the Adoptee Rights Coalition. Besides here on Musings of the Lame, her writings on adoption issue have been published in The New York Times, BlogHer, Divine Caroline, Adoption Today Magazine, Adoption Constellation Magazine, Adopt-a-tude.com, Lost Mothers, Grown in my Heart, Adoption Voice Magazine, and many others. She has been interviewed by Dan Rather, Montel Williams and appeared on Huffington Post regarding adoption as well as presented at various adoption conferences, other radio and print interviews over the years. She resides in New York’s Hudson Valley with her husband, Rye, children, and various pets.

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2 Comments on "A Good Birthmom"

  1. Anonymous | October 27, 2011 at 4:28 am |

    Beautiful, indeed. I have so much to add to this. Perhaps I will write it down.

  2. DENISE | October 28, 2011 at 4:54 am |

    Thanks Claude for sharing this. The part about her mother being “too little, too late” was upsetting. What a difference between closed and open adoptions. Not like I approve of any kind of adoption. Just sayin’ the closed ones add to the trauma on both ends.

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