So You Want to Believe That Adoption is Different Now?
We want to believe that adoption is different now. We want to believe that mothers “choose” adoption. We want to believe that forced adoption practices have gone the ways of the BSE days. We don’t like to believe the old adoption horror stories and myths that we hear.
On Sunday September 9, 2012, Angels of Love Adoption Agency in Brooksville, Florida allegedly is accused of pressuring, lying, and defrauding a mother out of her child. Yes, THIS past September. As in, you know, 7 weeks or so ago.
Let’s Talk First About Angels of Love Adoption Agency
What do we know about this agency?
We’ll first off, Angels of Love Adoption Agency has a very simple, non informative website.
As listed by Corporate Wiki, their “non-profit” corporate name is Angels of Love Adoption Agency, Inc., but they also have another version that is “for Profit” at “A Beautiful Life Begins With Angels of Love Adoption Agency, Inc.” with a location in Spring Hill, FL. Active officers for Angels of Love Adoption Agency include Jill Bopp, John Bopp, Sallie Cummings and Tammy Hobbs. They filed as a Domestic Non Profit Corporation on Wednesday, August 03, 2011 in the state of Florida and is currently active. Darryl W Johnston serves as the registered agent for this organization. The for Profit name “A Beautiful Life Begins With Angels of Love Adoption Agency, Inc.”. Active officers include Jill Bopp, John Bopp, Darryl W Johnston and Tammy M Johnston. A Beautiful Life Begins With Angels of Love Adoption Agency, Inc. filed as a Domestic for Profit Corporation on Thursday, May 10, 2012 in the state of Florida and is currently active.
I could NOT find any non-profit information from the two data banks that I normally use. As you can see from the following image, the principals of these organizations clearly cross and are one in the same.
I like digging, so the following is just what a little time Googling has provided us with. There is very little information online about these people:
- Jill Marie Bopp is the owner of both versions of this adoption agency and is 41. She has been known to live in Spring Hill, FL; Hilton, NY; Spencerport, NY.
- There are NO good reviews on Yelp or Angie’s List, though I do find that THIS line is amusing: “Warranties: ASK FOR DETAILS”
- I’m also amused, though horrified would be a better choice of words, by the irony of this “profile blurb” on Mantra: “We adore our birth moms, and make sure they are taken care of!”
- No reviews of note here, But she is on Twitter as @LadyJMB and there is a MySpace profile and Ebay too. Looks like “bopp60” is her favorite username.
- I found this as well posted on About.com just this past June 21:
Hello everyone!
We are a newer agency in Florida and are looking for adoptive parents. We DO NOT have a long wait list like other, larger agencies. We have a very small, very short list.THIS IS FOR REAL!!! We need adoptive parents. If you live out of state, have a home study or are in the process of having a home study completed, please call. If you live in Florida and have a home study or if you need one completed, please call us! Angels of Love Adoption Agency, 352-585-9988 or 888-944-ANGEL. We have a web site Angels of Love Adoption – and can be emailed at info@angelsofloveadoption.org. We do not have the high fees of other agencies either and we can do out of state ICPC placementsThank you!!
Legal Status of Angels of Love Adoption Agency
Now, according to their website, they are licensed by the Department of Children and Families in Florida. So I ‘m digging to see who gave them that license and what they had to do to get it, but there seems to be not quite so much that is obviously public. The Florida Statutes read like statutes:
“License” means “license” as defined in s. 120.52(10). A license under this section is issued to a family foster home or other facility and is not a professional license of any individual. Receipt of a license under this section shall not create a property right in the recipient. A license under this act is a public trust and a privilege, and is not an entitlement. This privilege must guide the finder of fact or trier of law at any administrative proceeding or court action initiated by the department.”
OK, not so helpful. Since Darryl W Johnston is the registered agent, we’ll search for him now.
He apparently is a professional registered agent of many businesses. I’m guessing he’s a business lawyer. Aww look.. it’s their For Profit articles of incorporation! and here is the non-profit one. What is also interesting is that it seems that the non-profit arm was voluntarily dissolved on 7-16-12 which explains why I could not find them on my data searches for non-profits!
So what I see from legal documents are that it WAS Angels of Love Adoption Agency a nonprofit adoption agency that was in existence for about a year and now is a for profit adoption agency under the name A Beautiful Life Begins With Angels of Love Adoption Agency, Inc.
OK, so now we know their beginnings, here’s what they allegedly did according to the mother of the child:
How Grayson Was Relinquished
I’ll make a long story short, but I strongly suggest that you come on over to the Facebook page Justice for Grayson and read the full text of the kidnapping report that Rachel tried to file with the local Florida’ Sheriff’s Department.
In a nutshell, on June 30th, the mother, Rachel, contacted the A Beautiful Life Begins With Angels of Love Adoption Agency, Inc and asked for information sent and email contact only. Now, I know people love to say things like” Well, if you call an adoption agency, then you MUST be seriously thinking about adoption. After all, you go to a donut store to buy donuts” or some such cruddy logic. However, it’s not a crime or against the law to ASK for information nor does the act of contacting an adoption agency on any way commit a person to adoption relinquishment.
I have ordered my share of “informational” packets from Adoption Agencies before. I know their “recruiting tactics” very well. They Fed-ex the packets immediately. They are chock full of parent profiles and happy Kool-Aid drinking birthmother stories, and literally have been tied up in a bow. If you dare to give the agency a phone number (and many require that!), then be prepared t be called. Often.
They say they are “checking up” with you, but don’t be fooled. Adoption Agencies want your baby.
Angels of Love Adoption Agency Were Interested in Rachel’s Unborn Baby
They did not waste any time.
“Agency owner emailed me back and asked for my phone number and she called me after 5 minutes of me providing her my number. Agency owner asked me to meet with her. She brought Agency employee with her and did not tell me Agency employee would be coming too. I met with them the same day about 40 minutes after the phone call. Their office is 40 minutes from my house. They came to my house to pick me up and took me to McDonalds to talk. Mostly Agency owner spoke and asked what information I wanted, what I wanted, what I was looking for, they asked me about my doctor, they said they had a really good one, they said that the doctor I had didn’t sound that great, they could get me in that week to meet with one of their doctors, then they asked me if I wanted to do that, then they gave me some information, it was a booklet or something which I threw out that same week because I had decided at that time that I didn’t want my baby adopted.”
Should have been the end of the story, right? Rachel decided to say no to adoption and the agency folks should just go away, right?
That’s not the way adoption works. According to Rachel, they continued to call and text and set up doctor appointments and sonograms. They continued to show parent profiles and have Rachel met with prospective parents who were interested in her baby for adoption. Why didn’t Rachel just say no? From what I see, she did say no. Over and over. It doesn’t look like she said YES to adoption at ANY TIME.
And yet, they continue to talk to her.
Angels of Love Adoption Agency: Are They a Predatory Adoption Agency?
This are often common tactics of the adoption industry. They have the time and money to just wear people down. They do this when father’s rightfully contest illegal adoptions. They do this to expectant mothers too. Confused, unsure, feeling low, pregnant, scared, and under the ticking time bomb of pregnancy, they know how to find that Achilles’ heel and exploit it. They are so good at it that it’s really hard to see the subtle coercion in many adoption situations.
“I would receive between 3-4 and up to 12 texts per day from them and 2 phone calls and up to 4-5 phone calls per day even since I made contact with them in June.”
Along with the calls and texts, they allegedly drove her around, went to doctor’s appointments, ultrasounds, and visited at the hospital all the while promoting adoption and offering possible potential adoptive couples. Who knows why she let them. I don’t know why I froze like a deer in the headlights and kept the first six months of my pregnancy a secret. It doesn’t matter if she was just trying to be nice, or didn’t have a backbone, or just wasn’t sure and didn’t want to burn her bridges.
The bottom line is she claims she NEVER said YES, I want to relinquish my child either before or after birth
“Agency employee asked me if I had made a decision because Tim and Melena were coming to the hospital to pay for his circumcision. I told them that I had decided Grayson was coming home to stay with me.
Agency employee appeared very angry that I had made this decision. Her lips were pursed, she kept looking at her phone, she was avoiding eye contact and she appeared agitated. Her eyes would dart back and forth between the phone and Grayson, she did not look at me. Agency employee’s tone of voice towards me totally changed. Agency employee said that if I wasn’t sure, that there was a foster home Grayson could be placed in. I then said “No I want him to come home with me.” and then Agency employee said in a snappy tone, “That’s fine that is was your decision, and we will need to start the paperwork to get the expenses back.” I told them to let me know what the full amount was so I can make sure it got to them. She said she would have to do up the paperwork to calculate out the expenses. Agency employee gave me a card to send the payment to and would give me an invoice for their expenses. I did sign a document to pay back the expenses they paid to me. The document stated that if I decided to parent my baby that I would have to pay back the expenses. They never did provide me with a copy of this document after I signed it”
What Was Done by Jill Bopp at Angels of Love Adoption Agency? Who Knows?
So it looks like we could have an adoption agency strong arming this mother to place her child and she decides that despite their best efforts to woo her over, she wants to keep and parent her baby. She supposedly told them so. She claims she has already agreed that she owes them money for the expenses they provided for her.
This story should be over, right? Wrong. According to Rachel they waited until she was discharged and out of the protection of the hospital and found her in the hospital parking lot was she was trying to take her newborn home.
The Alleged Threat Was Sign the TPR Now or Go to Jail
Recovering from a C-section birth, under the influence of Percocet, Rachel reports this.
“Then, I hear Agency owner yell my name across the parking lot, she was near her vehicle. She approached me and told me she needed to talk to me because I was going to go to jail. I asked her why. She had the phone she took from me up to her ear and was talking to someone and she said to the person, ‘She’s right here I’ll give you the phone and you can talk to her.’ I said ‘Hello’ and it was Bio-dad. He asked me why I was trying to run out of the hospital. I said, I wasn’t running as I just had surgery. I told him Isabelle had Grayson in the car to go home. He said I needed to think about what I was doing because I was going to go to jail that I couldn’t take ‘that baby home’. I said I didn’t understand what he was talking about and asked why he thought I was going to jail? He said that Agency owner told him that I had lied to them about him and gave them wrong information. I told him that wasn’t true and that I needed to pay back the expenses and he said Agency owner told him that I was given $5,000 and if I don’t sign over the baby that I would go to jail for ‘a felonly’. I told him it wasn’t true. He started arguing and we hung up. Agency owner then asked me to come over to her vehicle and my family followed in the car. They were overhearing the conversation, and I asked if I could talk to an attorney tomorrow and she said, ‘No, you have to sign or you go to jail.”
Rachel signed away her rights to her newborn son in the hospital parking lot under unconfirmed duress, the influence and false pretenses.
Welcome to Adoption in America
Rachel is fighting to get her son back from this adoption agency.
We know how hard and often impossible these cases are especially in Florida. Once a mother signs, then there is no revoke period under law.
There was a court date on 10-22-12, but of course they are fighting. Angels of Love is supposedly saying that Rachel decided at the last minute to relinquish hence the last minute exchange in the parking lot. As we know, these are long hard fights and the longer they go on, the more chances that the adoptive parents will dig in their heels and hang on to Grayson.
There will be a fund set up to take donations for legal fees, however they are having a VERY HARD time finding a lawyer in Florida that will take on this case. If you know of any Florida attorneys that want to really do something good in this world, then PLEASE send them along! Also if you have any media contacts, let them know!
If you find more information on the case or want to help spread the word be sure to add it to the Listly list below. Remember, you can embed the list just about anywhere!
Please, SHARE freely far and WIDE!!!
ETA: 12-7-12:
Grayson is three months old today.
I have received a CEASE and DESISTS letter from a Darryl W. Johnston at Johnston & Sasser, P.A who are the attorneys representing Angles of Love Adoption Angry in Florida regarding the Justice for Grayson case.
Hence, any unproven accusations against the agency have been removed at their request. The post has been edited on this date 12-7-12.
I would also like to publicly offer representatives of Angles of Love Adoption Agency to contact me at fixadoption@ gmail dot com to set up an interview so that they can add their side of the story to the post as well.
Here is the Letter I received form Darryl W. Johnston at Johnston & Sasser, P.A:
Our Law firm represents Angels of Love Adoption Angency. The purpose of this letter is to request the removal of martial related to the agency from your website titled; MusingsoftheLame. The specific material is at: http://www.musingsofthelame.com/2012/10/how-angels-of-love-adoption-agency.html
Your website is proliferating a falsified story of a birth mother who willingly placed her child for adoption with my client. There is a lawsuit pending in the circuit court of the Hernando County Florida in case number H-27-DR 2012-2549 related to the birth mother’s false claims,. She and her followers are using your platform to defame and libel my client.
Defamatory language is language that tends to adversely affect one’s reputation. Libel is written defamation. There are certain types of libel which are considered “libel per se” which means an injuery to reputation is presumed without proof of special damages, The person hurt by the libel per se may recover compensatory and punitive damages without proof of actual injury. A defamatory statement adversely reflecting someone’s ability in his business or the person is dishonest is an example of libel per se. Your republication of the allegations of criminal conduct are actionable.
You are requested to immediately shut down the website or alternatively, remove any references to Angles of Love Adoption Agency and the false statements contained in your website. This is a very serious matter, and you should immediately discuss with your attorney the consequences of spreading such statements.
Your corporation is appreciated. Please govern yourself accordingly.
I’m all about the compromise and I do look forward to the day that we find out what really went on in this case.
This is an outrage, thank you so much for bringing this to our attention! Please, keep us all updated as to what we can do to help …
Laura
Attorney David Peek in Jacksonville, Florida. He’s a good man. If he can’t help, he may know someone who can.
Thank you! Will pass it on!
Attorney Peek does wills and estates – thank you for your suggestion, though. However, the search continues.
Do not write Attorney Peek off. This is not his specialty but he may be able to direct Rachel to exactly who she needs. And if he is able to do so, he will.
Love your info about the awful peeps who run the agency. Yes, two of them were the perpetrators of stealing Rachel’s son.
Thanks to you!
You had the name of the agency posted last night.. so all I had to do was a bit of Googling! I love research!
Clearly you do. Can you believe their effing website, and the language the vipers use? and are you getting ready for the big storm???
As an adoptive parent, and a human being, this makes me sick to my stomach 🙁
I think there are ethical adoptions, but this s horrible. How would the adoptive parents live with themselves?
Define “ethical”? I fail to see where ethics comes into play, when any child is removed from its very own Mother, its very own family, its very own unique existence, is then placed with a woman who can afford to purchase “her very own baby”, and “groomed” to become a different human being than the good LORD intended.
Please tell me how one can consider “adoption’ as ethical.
What happened with Grayson and Rachel, is identical ALMOST word/actions for word to my surrendering 20 some yrs ago, with my twin sons. Please save the “adoptions are so much better today than in ancient times attitude.” As you can see obviously not!
Anonymous above me, do you think thousands of women being coerced out of their children via lies and manipulations or bogus open adoptions are ‘ethical adoptions’? Do you think mothers of the BSE who had no choice but to surrender their babies because they were unwed were “ethical adoptions”? I beg to differ with you. I don’t think domestic infant adoption is ethical at all. Not by a long shot. Most adoption agencies are run by slime bags who think of nothing but the bottom line, the money they will get for the sale of a young woman’s infant to their customers. They may not be as overtly disgusting as this particular agency, but they operate the same way, believe me.
-Mom422
This story is heartbreaking. It is 2012 FFS!! This shit should not be happening anymore and yet it is because the image of adoption is being presented in a fraudulent manner.
THIS is what adoption really is under all the lies and pretty bows. THIS is the more honest image of adoption and yet so many stay blind to the truth.
Adoption is really about sourcing babies for couples not about finding homes for children in need. That has become the cover so agencies can do THIS.
I hope there is something that can be done to put this evil right. Absolutely criminal.
There are no ethics in infant adoption. These agencies are not about finding homes for orphans. They’re about breaking up a family by breaking down the mother. Adoption is very rarely the better choice. Adoption provides a child with a different life, not always a better one. Women aren’t young, broke, uneducated or single forever. Once a woman becomes pregnant, she is forever that childs mother! No mother will move on after adoption as if it never happened. It is sentencing yourself to a life of wonder and worry, the most painful seperation imaginable. Adoption breaks up vulnerable familes. Adoption laws need changed in our country!
My heart breaks for this mother and her baby.
This story is absolutely horrifying. I am heartbroken for her, and for any and all first mothers who have been coerced in any way into surrendering their children.
However, there absolutely are ethical adoptions. When my husband and I chose an adoption agency we chose one based almost entirely on ethics alone. We chose an agency who was a pioneer in open adoption, and gay rights in adoption. Where every counselor there has either a masters or phd in social work. Where there is lifelong counseling offered for birth families. Where birth mothers do not have to pay back a dime of any support which has been offered them should they choose to parent. Where the counselors will actually help expectant moms find the resources they need, should they decide to parent up front, or change their minds after birth. Where open adoption agreements are facilitated, signed, and filed with a court (in our state they are enforceable).
In our case, our son’s birth mother (let’s call her Willow) was a teenager with drug abuse problems, who was in juvenile hall, who already had a daughter who her mom was raising. Willow had left her daughter at her mom’s when her daughter was three weeks old – no one had taken her daughter from her, and she was free to return to her at any time yet had chosen not to.
Willow did drugs every day during her first trimester when she was pregnant with her/our son, until she was locked up. When she was released she went right back to drugs until she was locked up again. Her mother was unable and unwilling to raise another baby. There was no other biological family willing to step up. Our son’s birth father was in prison, was a drug dealer, was a member of the aryan brotherhood gang, was violent, and was cruel. Willow had a restraining order against him. He had no family willing to step up either.
Willow told me that she didn’t want to hold her son when he was born, that she didn’t want to be alone with him, that she wanted to act like it was I who had just given birth and she was visiting me in the hospital, instead of the other way around. I actually encouraged her to hold him, encouraged her to spend time with him alone, encouraged her to have him room with her at night when they were in the hospital together.
When she was discharged we put her up in a room at the hotel right next to ours. We hoped she would spend more time with baby, but she chose to be with an old boyfriend instead. At the hospital one of the nurses kept talking to her when we weren’t there telling her that she didn’t need to choose adoption (I know because she told me about it). Even when she went later that week to sign relinquishments there were people there to make sure she knew that she didn’t have to do that. But she wanted to do it. She told me that even if she won the lottery she would still want to place her child with us because she was in no way able to give him the life she wanted for him. Not just with money and things, but with stability, and without drug-addiction and violence.
Willow initially wanted a closed adoption but we were the ones who convinced her to keep in touch with us, and that we would like to send her pictures and updates, and be friends with her and have visits. I know this may be hard for you to believe, but the vast majority of adoptive parents that I know who have issues with the levels of openness in their adoptions are themselves the ones who long for more contact, not the other way around! It is often birth mothers that I see closing adoption or drifting away or not responding to phone calls or letters. Of course not in every case, but in many cases!
continued …
continued …
When Willow got pregnant for a third time shortly after placing her son with us, we started saving and sending her all of our son’s old clothes and things. We helped her with a deposit on an apartment. We bailed her out a couple other times when money was tight. Our adoption worker contacted her to help her get connected with programs that could help her. There was no mention of adoption. We were all rooting for her! Then SHE started considering adoption for this baby. She chose friends of ours to place her baby with so that the children could grow up close together knowing that they were brothers. My friends paid her rent, her utilities, her vet bills, her groceries, everything for the last two months of her pregnancy, once Willow had decided on adoption.
Well, guess what, in the hospital Willow started reconsidering. What did our adoption worker do? Nothing. She said it would be unethical for her to talk to Willow when she was in the hospital, but she told us that she had already assured Willow throughout the process that she didn’t owe my friends anything and that she had the right to change her mind at any time. Were my friends heartbroken? Of course they were! But what did they do? They congratulated Willow on the birth of her son and made sure she knew that they understood. After a little time went by they sent her some children’s books as a gift, since they thought that wasn’t the kind of thing food stamps could buy.
Now I am the one longing for contact with Willow. We had formed a close and loving relationship but after the birth of her last child she has pulled away from me. We are friends on Facebook and I see how much she is struggling and it breaks my heart. I reach out with love and offer to keep sending clothes but she doesn’t respond.
Wow, ok … I didn’t intend to write this much! But I read your blog and I understand to my limited capability where you are coming from and you raise many valid points about what needs to be changed in terms of how adoption is handled in our society. However I finally (FINALLY) felt moved to respond here because I truly, truly believe that there are ethical adoptions out there and I wanted to share that with you.
I am truly sorry for the way you were treated when your child was born. I thank you for all your work in helping to bring many important thoughts, feelings, and ideas to the public regarding adoption.
—
P.S. – Sorry for being anonymous. Frankly, I’m a little scared of you guys. 😉
I don’t blame you of being afraid of us, but really, we have some adoptive parents in our ranks and I think you would fit right in. I’m a mother that was coerced by my family and society to relinquish in 1980. I also know the other side. My sister adopted a sibling pair of toddlers. Her daughter (my niece) was on the streets at 12 years old and has now had five children. She has relinquished four children so far. These children need loving homes that respect their original families. I for one say God Bless You for helping a child in need.
So much reform is needed. Pregnant women should not have their rent and expenses paid for by PAPs. It’s not fair to anyone. And no money, none, none, none should trade hands. Personality testing should be done to rule out abusive people from adopting. Of course a few will slip through but we would catch a lot more of the sicko’s if we did the same testing that is done to get simple jobs!
The reason I think your adoption is ethical is because you are giving a home to a child that needs one. Adoption in our country ALMOST always is about getting babies for parents to grow their families. That needs to stop. Babies are not commodities. Children do better with their own biological safe parents EVERY time. Mothers need to be nurtured so that they can believe in themselves and be there for their children. No one wants to be adopted.
Hey Claud, just read about the cease and desist! way to go!
If every one of your readers re-post, they will have to send a lot of c&d letters. Pigs.
why are none of you so called ethical adoption people helping the mothers at all? they are the children in crisis…..not their babies……ffs how can you sleep at night……..
Go Claudia!
I am the “ethical adoption people” who posted my adoption story above. I HAVE tried to help my son’s birth mother again and again. I have fought to get her into programs, helped her find places to live, paid her rent at times, paid for gas for her to get to a sober living program who would take her and her son (who she had since my son’s adoption and who she is parenting – with her abusive boyfriend who is violent and a drug addict), bought her groceries, done all I could to try to make it so that she could parent her son well. She didn’t go to the programs which would take her. She won’t leave the abusive boyfriend. She won’t fight to get her daughter who she abandoned as an infant back. You think everyone can magically be a great parent and have a happy life if only they had a little help??
Now she has cut *me* off and closed the adoption herself (even though I continue to send clothes and things for her son). We are not all monsters. And not all birth mothers would be wonderful mothers if only someone would give a crap about them.
Which state enforces open adoption agreements? What are the penalties? Can a first parent obtain primary custody? What rights do father’s have adoption? Can they petition for visitation? Why do adoptor s change a birth certificate? Or more importantly why not leave them alone, do not adoptors have legal documents of there parental rights?
Lost birth father. Cried for 29 years to be part of my daughter’s life. Closed adoption. Or what was open was fast tracked upon relinquishing, this in Washington state 1985, lies & secrets to obtain & keep. Ornament of so called loving angels. It is not lost on me to let my daughter loose too, I agonize about her adoption truths, she holds to her adoption glory, these fairy tales that were told sustain her. She found me, she now says, she is sorry for not searching sooner. She apologizes to her parents for searching….She shows confusion for things her parents have said, blow ups, not sure why she has shared such information with me. She was proud her parents always told her she was adopted. I told her every one has there own truths, myths are created this way.
As Grayson’s mother, who is still in the fight for my son. The only thing I can say is that I never chose to give up my son. I was threatened while still medicated. I was not allowed to call for legal council even before my son was taken out of my vehicle where he was fastened in the car seat I purchased. I repeatedly asked to speak with someone about it all and was denied yet even when it started to rain I was not allowed to get in my car and leave over threats that I’d be kidnapping my own son. I made the decision that my child was coming home with me and even after the agency sent the AP’s into my room to try and change my mind I was still stalked and ambushed while walkin to my car with my son. If that isn’t preditory, volitile, unethical behavior I don’t know what is. But my son Grayson will know that I wanted him,that I never stopped and he will know that
his ( so called) parents KNEW I never agreed to this and they knew he was stolen from me all for the all mighty dollar!