2010 Adoptee Rights Demonstration Video
In 2010, the Adoptee Rights Coalition held the 3rd annual Adoptee Rights Demonstration in Louisville KY and the National State Legislators Convention. This is the video.
In 2010, the Adoptee Rights Coalition held the 3rd annual Adoptee Rights Demonstration in Louisville KY and the National State Legislators Convention. This is the video.
In 2009, the Adoptee Rights Coalition held the 2nd annual Adoptee Rights Demonstration in Philadelphia PA and the National State Legislators Convention. This is what it was like.
What: first meeting of ACCESS MASSACUSETTS, a grass roots effort dedicated to passing legislation restoring the human right for all adult adopted people born in Massachusetts, access to their original birth certificates (OBC).
Where: Cambridge Family and Children’s Services office at 60 Gore Street, Cambridge, MA 02141
When: August 15th, from 6:30 PM – 8:00 PM
Who: ACCESS MASSACHUSETTS and YOU!
It seems that many people want to believe that because many adoption agencies and adoption service professionals have the words ” non-profit” in their name, that they must somehow be exempt from any form of monetary corruption. While I am still hunting down the most recent report claiming the 13 billion dollars of profits in the adoption industry, to even see if the nonprofit numbers are included in the actual 13 billion, I decided to share a quick bit about nonprofit adoption services.
A new adoption industry market data analyst report published just this year!! Even better this report does NOT group the fertility industry in at all but is just Adoption & Child Welfare Services in the US. This NEW Adoption Industry research puts the REVENUE made from Adoption related services at 13 BILLION.Shall we repeat that?
Thirteen Billion Dollars Made in Revenue from the Adoption Industry.
There is that classic saying, “you can’t change another person’s actions or feelings, but you can change how it affects you.” I think that is really important to remember in an adoption reunion. No matter how much we might want another person to think and feel and usually more importantly act, we cannot make that happen. No matter what you do, what hoops you jump through, the emotional gymnastics you attempt, you cannot change which you cannot control. If life was controlled by forces of sheer will alone, this world would be a much different, though I don’t know if necessarily better, place.
Truthfully? I have no idea. What works for one reunion might not work for another. The measure of what makes an adoption reunion successful really does depend on the parties involved and how they measure that success. Are they both satisfied with the measure of contact? Are they both getting what they need out of the relationship? Are the interactions relatively “healthy” aka not destructive to the other party? Again, so many variables, so many different personalities, so many different experiences, differences in timing, in support; how is one supposed to make heads or tails?
It often seems like a birthmother does not come out directly and say NO during a reunion. Of course, there are too many that do, but then there are a whole slew that just seem to fail miserably in the process of an active reunion. Meaning, on the outside, birthmother and adoptee have some contact, but due to her own damage, or expectation, or limitations, or personal boundaries and fears, over years and sometimes decades, the adoptee finds that the whole relationship feels unsatisfying. I completely understand that what one part might find “acceptable” in a reunion, the other party might really be left wanting way more. Let this go on for too long and what was an initial “yes” can turn into a ” I can’t take this anymore”.
Let’s face it ; we all love a good adoption reunion story. The media loves a reunion story. Most people off the street love a reunion story. In AdoptionLand, we especially enjoy hearing that another family separated by adoption has managed to beat the industry rules and find their way home. We marvel at the similarities and “near misses”. We get teary eyed seeing the cries of joy and the airport hugs. Yet, what happens after that first contact, that first find, that first phone call, that first hug is really where the determination of “success” comes into play.
So what does an adoption reunion look like when it works?
I have heard from more than a few good sources that many adoption attorneys are making most of their money through surrogacy agreements these days. In my opinion, the only difference between adoption relinquishment and surrogacy is that one pregnancy is usually unplanned and one pregnancy is planned. In either case, someone is getting paid for the separation of a mother and her genetic creation, her child.
This article analyzes the provisions in a collection of birth mother surrender documents assembled by the author—seventy-five mid-twentieth century documents executed in twenty-six different states. In order to establish the significance of the surrender document provisions with respect to these claims, the article first relates depictions by birth mothers of a journey from silence to legislative advocacy. The article then examines the conflicting claims about birth mothers that pervade legislative contests over adult adoptee access to original birth certificates. Finally, the article analyzes the provisions of the surrender documents. The analysis of the provisions definitively supports birth mother advocates’ reports that women were neither offered a choice of nor guaranteed lifelong anonymity. Their opponents’ contentions to the contrary, whether motivated by concern for birth mothers or other interests, reinscribe an earlier culture of shame and secrecy, subordinating women’s own wishes and silencing their newly raised voices.
I have had a few people tell me that I should stop saying it because by perpetuating that reunion rejection by a birthmother is rare, then it sets up adoptees for disappointment when they are rejected. I can understand that. Yet, as I tried to explain, the factual research that I have available DOES really indicate that less than 1% of relinquishing mothers opt for no contact when given the choice.Of course, we do face the fact that any adoption research is never 100% accurate due to the fact that there is no one agency that oversees or even counts the numbers of adoptions and would enable the entire population of people affect by adoption to be counted.Yet, I would say that about half the adoptees I know struggle with have an nonexistent or unsatisfactory relationship with their found mothers. Why such a difference?
Now, we must remember she is a former ABORTIONIST PROFESSIONAL, so she’s must KNOW better than I about things like MY LIFE. Especially as there must be GOD on her side!
Please tell me what to do. After all, I have had many years of training being a “good birthmother” Yes, yes, perhaps I just need an adoption Kool-Aid booster shot? Give it to me, Abby! I’m just JONESING hardcore for that Adoption Kool-Aid! Yum..Pro-Life flavor!! My fav-o-rite!
Gazillion Voices will be an adoptee-led magazine focusing on topics and issues important to the adoption community and beyond. Currently, while Kevin teases us with posts and excerpts from the inaugural issue, there is a KickStarter campaign going to defray the costs of creating a real magazine! I was thrilled and did not hesitate at all when Kevin asked me if I would consider being part of the LGA team.
Do you know adoptees searching, either using the Facebook images, preferably with many shares and attention, or willing to go social, who are emotionally ready and willing to go public? Who really needs the help with exposure? Who can handle the sensation filming? Who can represent?