Mary O’Leary Wiley; Independent Practice
Amanda L. Baden; Montclair State University
This article addresses birth parents in the adoption triad by reviewing and integrating both the clinical and empirical literature from a number of professional disciplines with practice case studies. This review includes literature on the decision to relinquish one’s child for adoption, the early postrelinquishment period, and the effects throughout the lifespan on birth parents. Clinical symptoms for birth parents include unresolved grief, isolation, difficulty with future relationships, and trauma. Some recent research has found that some birth mothers who relinquish tend to fare comparably to those who do not relinquish on external criteria of well-being (e.g., high school graduation rates).
However, there appear to be serious long-term psychological consequences of relinquishment. Limitations of the current literature are presented, and recommendations for practice and research are offered.
For Monica, from Her Birthmother
We’ve grown together for two years.
We’ve shared together your laughter and tears.
Since your first moments in this world
So many, many things have unfurled.
Once a child, you’re grown now,
The time has come to pass.
Know I’ll always love you.
That’s all I’ll ever ask.
You’ve had the time to live and grow.
How was I to ever, ever know
I couldn’t give the care that you would need.
Mine wouldn’t be the voice that you would heed.
When I had to say good-bye to you
I didn’t know how much that I’d go through
Wanting to be with you all the while.
I pray you have someone to care
And friends that always, always will be there
A family to support you all the time
Who give the love I long to give a child of mine.
—Imelda Buckley (Roles, 1989, p. 7)
Although the feelings expressed in Imelda Buckley’s poem are widely
understood, birth parents are the least studied, understood, and served members
of the adoption triad (Freundlich, 2002; Reitz & Watson, 1992;
Zamostny, O’Brien, Baden,&Wiley, 2003). Birth parents are often the invisible
members of the adoption triad. For some, this is by choice; for others, it is
an artifact of the adoption system and its historical legal requirements of full
relinquishment, secrecy, and anonymity (Winkler, Brown, van Keppel, &
Blanchard, 1988). In international adoptions, birth parents are often permanently
invisible and silent as a result of the cultural norms and structures
related to relinquishing their children (Lee, 2003; Steinberg & Hall, 2000).
Historically, research has been more limited on this hard-to-access population
than on other members of the adoption triad (Freundlich, 2002;
Zamostny, et al., 2003a), although theory and clinical observations related to
the experience of birth parents have a longer history (A. Brodzinsky, 1990;
Winkler&van Keppel, 1984). Both clinical and empirical research literature
related to birth parents has been undertaken in a wide variety of professional/
academic disciplines and in a number ofWestern countries. Disciplines contributing
to this research have included psychology (A. Brodzinsky, 1990;
Fravel, McRoy, & Grotevant, 2000), psychiatry (Condon, 1986; Rynearson,
1982), social work (DeSimone, 1996; Dworkin, Harding, & Schreiber,
1993), and child welfare (Blanton&Deschner, 1990; Chippindale-Bakker&
Foster, 1996). Extensive data on birth parents have been collected in Australia
(Condon, 1986) and Canada (Chippendale-Bakker & Foster, 1996) as
well as the United States. Integration of this literature has been limited in part
because of the paradigmatic differences in research and practice among disciplines.
This lack of integration has slowed both the development of empirical
research and the clinical treatment of birth parents. Zamostny, Wiley,
O’Brien, Lee, and Baden (2003) have called on counseling psychologists to
break the silence of the mental health community about issues related to
adoption (as noted by Henderson, 2002), including the experiences of birth
parents.
Between 1 million and 5 million Americans are adopted (Hollinger, 1998;
Stolley, 1993), leading to the inference that up to 10 million people are birth
parents of adoptees reared in America. These birth parents are from both the
United States and numerous other countries, making this group a global pop-
ulation. Terminology related to this group has changed over the years and has
included natural parent, biological parent, genetic parent, and real parent.
However, the terms birth parent, birth mother, and birth father have become
accepted nomenclature for referring to the mother and father who gave birth
to a child who was placed for adoption (A. Brodzinsky, 1990).
As noted by Zamostny et al. (2003b), counseling psychology has much to
offer in the understanding of adoption in general and birth parents in particular,
including counseling psychology’s focus on science-practice integration,
developmental tasks and models, healthy coping skills, prevention
approaches, adjustment to life transitions, and viewing development from a
multicultural perspective (Gelso & Fretz, 2001). The purposes of this article
are to provide a scientist-practitioner review of the interdisciplinary clinical
and empirical literature on birth parents, to incorporate this literature with
actual case studies, and to make recommendations for practice and research
based on this literature.
Woven into this literature are several clinical case studies derived from the
authors’ combined 33 years of counseling experience and one of the author’s
extensive experience with international adoption practice. Clinical interventions
and issues are drawn from the literature, the authors’ experience, and
model programs for birth parents (e.g., Barker Foundation, 2004; Center for
Family Connections, 2004; Spence-Chapin, 2004).
This article first includes a review of the clinical and research literature for
three periods in the life of a birth parent: (a) the prerelinquishment period,
including both voluntary and involuntary relinquishment; (b) the early
postrelinquishment period; and (c) long-term postrelinquishment, including
search and reunion. Each of these sections includes a case study of a birth
mother in counseling, including presenting issues, background factors,
assessment concerns, treatment issues, and effective treatment strategies.
Reviews follow of the clinical and research literature on birth fathers, international
birth parents, and openness in adoption for birth parents. The final
sections discuss structuring research and practice, practice and research
implications, and future directions.
PRERELINQUISHMENT PERIOD
The day you were born was a very difficult but happy time. When I heard your
cry at 11:30 pm, I was looking at you with much joy in my heart. While I looked
at you I felt so weak; you were the most important part of me. You were so adorable
when you cried. Although I am the naïve mother who bore you, I wondered
who will raise you and take care of you. I love you very much. I also
loved you very much as you developed in my womb. I whispered, “I love you,
my dear baby” whenever I felt you in my womb. I was grateful to you whenever
you stirred so gently in my womb because it felt as if you were looking after
me. My dear son, please remember that I will always love you very much. I also
want you to remember that you are my son and are very important to me. I
remember like it was yesterday the way that you used to fall asleep. I miss you
more and more as the days go by, and my heart aches. (A Korean birth mother;
Dorow, 1999, pp. 16-17)
Voluntary Relinquishment
The decision about whether to voluntarily relinquish one’s child for adoption
is likely the most difficult decision a birth parent will ever have to make
(Winkler et al., 1988). Typically, it is the birth mother who seeks professional
services, but increasingly, the experience is shared by the birth father. The
conflicting feelings of shame, pride, desolation, excitement, fear, terror, and
denial can be overwhelming and disruptive. Birth parents consistently report
that they do not talk about their feelings because somehow they believe their
feelings are abnormal and out of proportion to the crisis they face. However,
the authors must note that in recent years, those who assist prospective birth
mothers (e.g., adoption agencies, attorneys, and medical professionals) have
increasingly recognized the need for birth mothers to receive counseling and
support, thereby allowing them to face their feelings and the enormous decisions
they must make with more compassion and dignity (Janus, 1997; Sobol
& Daly, 1992).
Different theoretical models have offered varied clinical interpretations of
the issues that birth mothers face. Early psychodynamic models (Deutsch,
1945) viewed the unwed mother as using her pregnancy to regressively act
out unconscious, unmet needs toward her own mother. Jung (1989) used
early family systems theory to describe the unplanned pregnancy as a statement
of ambivalent feelings and powerlessness in the family. Less psychodynamic,
but no less influential,was the description of adoption that Silverstein
and Kaplan (1988) proposed. They depicted adoption as a lifelong, intergenerational
process that unites the triad of birth families, adoptees, and
adoptive families forever. They proposed seven core issues in adoption that
can be used to assist all triad members and professionalsworking in adoption
to better understand each other and the residual effects of the adoption experience.
These seven issues include (a) loss, (b) rejection, (c) guilt and shame,
(d) grief, (e) identity, (f) intimacy, and (g) mastery/control. Shortly thereafter,
D. M. Brodzinsky’s (1987, 1990) stress and coping model described the
cognitive adjustments and adaptations birth parents undergo in adjusting to
the pregnancy and making complex decisions regarding relinquishment.
Most recently, attachment theory combined with developmental neurobiology
has been used to hypothesize that stress hormones and neurotransmitters
of the birth mother affect the developing fetus differentially
depending on the level of attachment that the birth mother experiences with
her child (Axness, 2001; Maret, 1997; Rini, Dunkel-Schetter, Wadhwa, &
Sandman, 1999).
Nine empirical studies were identified that described largely adolescent
birth mother samples and compared mothers who relinquished their children
with control groups who chose to parent their children, making prerelinquishment
the largest category of birth parent research. These studies were
all undertaken either in the United States or Canada, were most often done in
maternity homes or adoption agencies, and tended to focus exclusively on
predictive external variables such as age, race, educational level, socioeconomic
status (SES), family situation, and attitudes. Several variables
were consistently found to be related to relinquishment, including race, age,
socioeconomic level, educational level, preference of birth grandmother,
vocational goals, and living arrangements (Chippendale-Bakker & Foster,
1996; Cocozzelli, 1989; Dworkin et al., 1993; Herr, 1989; Low, Moely, &
Willis, 1989; McLaughlin, Pearce, Manninen, & Winges, 1988; Resnick,
Blum, Bose, Smith, & Toogood, 1990;Warren & Johnson, 1989;Weinman,
Robinson, Simmons, Schreiber, & Stafford, 1989).
Chippendale-Bakker and Foster (1996) did retrospective analysis on the
files of 99 women, ages 14 to 23 (M= 22.8 years), from a Catholic Canadian
adoption agency. Their sample comprised 78% Caucasian, 21% African
Canadian, 6% Asian, 3% Native Canadian, and 4% mixed-race women.
Cocozzelli (1989) analyzed file data on 279 women (M = 21.4 years) from
two Hawaiian adoption agencies. Thirty-seven percent were White, 13%
Hawaiian, 9% Black, 8% Japanese, 7% Caucasian-Asian, 6% Filipino, 6%
American Indian, and 14% Asian and Southeast Asian.Dworkin et al. (1993)
studied 162 pregnant adolescents in a U.S. maternity home (M= 16.0 years).
They comprised 48.3% Black,15% Hispanic, and 36% Whitewomen. Herr’s
(1989) sample included 125 pregnant U.S. adolescents (M = 16.9 years).
Fifty percent of her sample were White, 44% Black, and 6% other. Warren
and Johnson (1989) studied 175 women ages 14 to 22 with unplanned pregnancies
in Texas and California. Fifty percent were Black, 30% White, and
20% Mexican. Low et al. (1989) surveyed 62 unmarried adolescent women
in their third trimester of pregnancy (M = 17.2 years). Sixty-eight percent
were White and 32% Black. McLaughlin et al. (1988) surveyed women who
had recently participated in an adoption program in Minnesota and compared
those who relinquished with those who parented. Racial and ethnic backgrounds
were not provided. The mean agewas 21.4. Resnick et al. (1990) did
individual interviews with 118 young women (ages ranged from 13 to 19
years; 97% White). Finally,Weinman et al. (1989) analyzed agency records
in a Texas maternity home. Their sample included 474 residents over a 2-year
period. Seventy percent were listed as minority and 30% Caucasian.
The literature consistently documented that White women relinquished
their infants for adoption at higher rates thanwomen of color, including African
American, Mexican American, and Filipino American women
(Chippendale-Bakker & Foster, 1996; Cocozzelli, 1989; Dworkin et al.,
1993; Herr, 1989; Warren & Johnson, 1989; Weinman et al., 1989). All of
these studies found race to be a predictive variable of relinquishment, with
White women most likely to relinquish and African American (or African
Canadian) women least likely.
Moreover, the literature suggested that single mothers in African American
communities are less likely to make adoption plans for their infants and
more likely to use what has been termed informal adoption (Sandven &
Resnick, 1990). An explanation offered for the lower rates of adoption for
birth mothers of color is based on both cultural norms from African ancestors
and survival norms from postslavery America, where family boundaries
include extended family and are not limited to the nuclear family. One legacy
of the forced separations of families during slavery has been a strong need
reported by many African Americans to retain children of African heritage to
be raised within their culture and community. Thus, various forms of informal
adoption arrangements have included both shared parenting with
extended family and “gifting” a child to an extended family member without
legally relinquishing parental rights, practices historically unrelated to social
class (Landrine&Klonoff, 1996). Other explanations for lower rates of relinquishment
to adoption point to the lack of economic opportunity for birth
mothers of color resulting from issues of oppression and privilege. Authors
have not focused, however, on the possibility that birth mothers of color do
not relinquish as often because children of color are less likely to be adopted
(Lee, 2003).
The research literature also described recent trends in adoption plans (i.e.,
decisions to relinquish children for adoption). Adoption plans tended to be
made by single mothers of higher socioeconomic and educational groups
than those who chose to parent (Chippendale-Bakker & Foster, 1996;
McLaughlin et al., 1988; Resnick et al., 1990). Adolescent mothers who
chose to parent tended to be younger (early to mid-teens) and of a lower SES,
whereas those who made an adoption plan tended to be older (late teens) and
of a higher SES (Dworkin et al., 1993;Warren&Johnson, 1989). Birth mothers
who made an adoption plan were also found to have higher vocational
aspirations and more goal-directed life plans than those who chose to parent
(Cocozzelli, 1989; Low et al., 1989).
Family attitudes and dynamics were found to predict the likelihood of a
birth mother making an adoption plan versus choosing to parent. Several
studies found that one of the strongest predictors of relinquishment was the
preference of the birth mother’s mother (Chippendale-Bakker & Foster,
1996; Dworkin et al., 1993; Herr, 1989; Lowet al., 1989). The birth mother’s
relationship with the birth father also was found to be predictive of relinquishment,
particularly when the birth mother changes from an adoption to a
parenting plan (Dworkin et al., 1993).
In summarizing the reasons given by birth mothers for making an adoption
plan, Chippendale-Bakker and Foster (1996) stated that most “do so out
of a belief that it will offer a better life for their child than they are able to provide”
(p. 341). Resnick et al. (1990) added an additional factor in their summary
and reported that both the baby’s best interest and the birth mother’s
own school plans were primary motivators for making an adoption plan.
CASE STUDY 1
Presenting issues. Kathleen was a 17-year-old Caucasian from a middleclass
family who was 6-months pregnant and was experiencing symptoms of
panic, depression, and anxiety.
Background factors. Kathleen, a senior in high school, is the eldest of two
children. Her parents have been married for 18 years. Kathleen had been dating
her boyfriend, Tommy, for more than a year, but did not want to marry
him and did not want to “wreck my [her] life” by becoming a mother at this
stage. After she contacted a private attorney/family friend to make an adoption
plan for her child, Kathleen’s school counselor referred her for more
comprehensive therapy.
Assessment concerns. Kathleen’s judgment and insight appeared to be
good, but she was experiencing ambivalence and fear that she was not making
what she called a “popular” choice for her baby. Kathleen’s parents were
encouraging relinquishment and adoption, but Kathleen heard negative comments
about her plan from numerous friends, teachers, and relatives. Even
the nurse in her obstetrician’s office said that she didn’t know how Kathleen
could “do such a thing.” Kathleen was preparing to review histories of prospective
adoptive parents for her baby, and she knew that this was what she
wanted for herself and her baby but felt alone, isolated, and sad.
Treatment issues. Kathleen was trying to avoid internalizing the judgments
of others and repeatedly stated the need to do what is right for her baby
and herself, but her limited social support was a vital area to address in treatment.
Kathleen’s fears resulted in multiple changes to her adoption plan (i.e.,
wavering between keeping and relinquishing the baby) and thereby limited
her ability to feel comfortable and safe in her choice. These fears also hindered
her progress through the grieving and relinquishment process.
Effective treatment strategies. Her therapist validated all options as potential
choices, including both relinquishment and parenting, and also provided
her a nonjudgmental place to talk about her ambivalent feelings. Using
knowledge of the adoption system and the lifelong effect of relinquishment,
Kathleen’s therapist urged her to join a support group for relinquishing mothers
at a local private adoption agency and to explore placement through an
adoption agency with a strong birth parent support program. The therapist
knew that working with such an agency would allow Kathleen to receive support
for the relinquishment issues she would experience throughout her lifetime
(support a private attorney could not provide). The agency Kathleen
chose to work with had an ongoing birth parent support program that she
could work with at any time throughout her life. This agency sent materials to
Kathleen’s physician and to the obstetrics unit where Kathleen would deliver
her baby so that they would understand the unique needs of a mother planning
to relinquish her child for adoption (Melina & Melina, 1988). Kathleen
worked with her social worker at the agency, chose a mediated contact adoption
for her baby (one with limited exchange of information between birth
parents and adoptive parents), and participated in choosing the adoptive parents.
During her 8th month of pregnancy, with her therapist, Kathleen met the
adoptive parents and wrote a letter to her baby that included photographs.
Kathleen wavered on her adoption plan a few times toward the end of pregnancy
but followed through with her decision to allow the adopting parents to
be with the baby immediately after delivery. Her widened support system of
her parents, therapist, agency, and birth mother support group was invaluable
to her both before and after relinquishment.
As this case illustrates, Kathleen’s experience of the prerelinquishment
period is a typical one in many ways. Her symptoms of depression and anxiety
are common. Kathleen’s background and her personal feelings are
reflected in the literature’s findings regarding her likelihood of making an
adoption plan (i.e., her mother preferred that she make an adoption plan, she
was a Caucasian teen from a middle-class family, and she did not feel ready
for the responsibility of a baby). However, given the pressure and negative
judgments from others regarding her choice to relinquish her baby, Kathleen
clearly needed structured prerelinquishment support that could come in the
form of therapy, support groups, or other supportive resources. Her therapist
provided this adoption-sensitive (Janus, 1997) support for her decision making
and assisted Kathleen in three crucial ways: (a) by providing a referral to a
support group of other birth mothers who were making choices about adoption
plans and to an adoption agency with a strong and sensitive birth parent
program, (b) by demonstrating competence regarding the issues for relinquishing
birth mothers and being nonjudgmental and supportive of
Kathleen’s decisions, and (c) by creating an atmosphere where Kathleen
could prepare for the relinquishment and could provide a link for her child
following the relinquishment (by participating in choosing the adoptive parents
and giving them a letter and photographs) . Adoption specialists report
that prerelinquishment counseling for the birth mother is best both for her
and for preventing a disrupted adoption later. This case study illustrates several
aspects of the specific knowledge that is crucial for effective therapy during
the prerelinquishment period and reflects the points elucidated for adoption-
sensitive counselors (Janus, 1997).
Relinquishment Continuum and Coerced Relinquishment
It is important to note that the distinction between voluntary and involuntary
relinquishments is actually a continuum rather than a dichotomy.
Whereas some birth parents who sign voluntary relinquishment papers actually
feel coerced by loved ones, spouses, parents, or even their culture (i.e.,
cultural norms against childbearing out of wedlock) to relinquish their children
(DeSimone, 1996), other birth parents who formally have their rights
terminated by the court system can be in agreement with that plan. This continuum
and the issue of coercion have not been addressed in the birth parent
literature and have been addressed only as an ethical issue in the more recent
adoption literature (Post, 1996). Although no literature currently exists that
documents this phenomenon, the personal stories and communications of
many birth parents, particularly birth mothers, strongly support the concept
of a continuum. The distinction between the legal category of relinquishment
(voluntary vs. involuntary) and the emotional experience of the birth parent(
s) (totally voluntary vs. coerced) is important to make in both practice
and research.
Involuntary Relinquishment
When birth parents do not choose to relinquish their children voluntarily,
the experiences of birth parents during the prerelinquishment period differ
greatly. Involuntary relinquishment is accompanied by legal processes and
court decisions that culminate in a process known as the termination of
parental rights (Edelstein, Burge,&Waterman, 2002;Wattenberg, Kelley,&
Kim, 2001). Likened to the “death penalty” for parents because of its finality
and gravity (Hewett, 1983), the termination of parental rights is a path that
leads to distress and a unique and different set of birth parent issues.
Before the termination of their parental rights, birth parents whose children
are removed because of findings of neglect or maltreatment are given
visitation rights, and the children enter foster care. But who are these parents
who no longer have the legal right to parent their children? These parents
have been briefly and superficially described in the literature. The literature
describes their characteristics and tends to report reasons for the termination
of rights (e.g., mental illness, abusive domestic relationships, substance
abuse, limited intellectual functioning, legal problems or incarceration, or
inability to maintain stable housing; Wattenberg et al., 2001) and birth
mother background histories (e.g., little formal education, unemployment,
abuse, out-of-home placement as children, birth of first child at a young age,
children by multiple fathers, chaotic home environments; Wattenberg et al.,
2001), but national statistics on these individuals, developmental histories,
and outcomes are difficult to determine (Freundlich, 2002). Statistics on the
numbers of children whose parents have had their rights terminated can be
readily accessed (e.g., in 2001, parents of 65,000 children in the United
States have had their parental rights terminated; U.S. Department of Health
and Human Services, Administration for Children and Families, Administration
on Children, Youth and Families, Children’s Bureau, 2003); however,
statistics on the actual numbers of birth parents whose rights have been terminated
are not available. Despite this lack of reported statistics, recent trends in
family preservation support the rehabilitation of parents who have been
deemed neglectful or maltreating, and attempts at family reunification are
built into the system (Wattenberg et al., 2001). However, increasing concerns
about the length of time children spend in foster care without permanency
planning has spurred a movement toward legislation to speed the process of
termination of parental rights for parents who fail to make substantial
progress in their rehabilitation efforts (Festinger & Pratt, 2002).
We do not have a clear understanding of the experiences of birth parents
whose rights have been terminated. Research on the effect of parental rights
terminations reflects little attention to the effect of the involuntary relinquishment
on birth parents and focuses on the adoption or placement outcomes for
the children.
Also missing from the statistics on birth parents whose parental rights
have been terminated are data on their racial and ethnic backgrounds. Extrapolating
from the data available from 2001 (U.S. Department of Health and
Human Services, Administration for Children and Families, Administration
on Children, Youth and Families, Children’s Bureau, 2003) and assuming a
similar distribution among children in foster care and parents whose parental
rights have been terminated suggests that the racial and ethnic backgrounds
of those birth parents may generally fit the following categories: (a) 2%
American Indian non-Hispanic, (b) 1% Asian non-Hispanic, (c) 38% Black
non-Hispanic, (d) 17% Hispanic, (e) 37% White, (f) 3% unknown, and (g)
2% two or more races non-Hispanic. However, the racial-ethnic distribution
of people in America indicates very different proportions of racial-ethnic
minorities in the United States as follows: (a) 75.1% White, (b) 12.3% African
American, (c) 13% Hispanic or Latino, (d) 0.9% American Indian non-
Hispanic, (e) 3.7% Asian Pacific Islander non-Hispanic, (f) 5.5% other race
(Grieco&Cassidy, 2001). Thus, the disparity in the figures between the proportion
of racial and ethnic minorities in the population and the proportion of
racial and ethnic minorities whose parental rights are terminated suggests
some degree of inequity in several systems that affect involuntary relinquishment.
This bias can be attributed to institutions such as the judicial system
and children’s welfare agencies and can be a reflection of the system of disadvantage
(e.g., racism) and oppression all too commonly found in these institutions.
Moreover, although these disparate figures may also reflect bias and
oppression related to social class, the degree to which social class affects the
likelihood of involuntary termination of parental rights is not fully explained
in the literature.
The only research to address outcomes for birth parents whose rights have
been involuntarily terminated has repeatedly found long-term psychological
distress (Freundlich, 2002). Some outcomes commonly found among these
birth parents are (a) an ongoing sense of anger and guilt, (b) significant psychological
problems, (c) health problems usually associated with bereavement
(e.g., sleep and appetite disruption, dreams about loss and search), and
(d) relationship problems (Charlton, Crank, Kansara,&Oliver, 1998; Hughes
&Logan, 1993; Mason&Selman, 1997).We found neither research nor documented
counseling programs that addressed birth parents following the
involuntary termination of their parental rights. Although a single study was
found that discussed group therapy issues for birth parents whose children
were in foster care (Charbonneau & Kaplan, 1989), no literature addressed
treatment following involuntary relinquishment. Given all the challenges
facing birth parents who involuntarily relinquish their children and the complete
failure to cover this issue in the literature, the case study below will
illustrate several issues likely to be presented by these birth parents.
CASE STUDY 2
Presenting issues. Joanne, a 27-year-old Caucasian woman, was referred
to a MICA (mental illness and chemically addicted) treatment center following
a recent hospitalization for a suicide attempt. Joanne had been diagnosed
with major depression 6 years ago and had a 9-year history of alcohol
dependency. During the intake session, Joanne, who has two sons ages 3 and
8, revealed that her parental rights were terminated prior to her suicide
attempt but that she had attempted suicide because she had been depressed
and drinking. Joanne expressed anger, sadness, guilt, and the inability to cope
with those emotions.
Background factors. Joanne is the middle child of a family with three children.
Her mother lives in Joanne’s hometown but has only irregular contact
with Joanne. Joanne’s father left her family when shewas 2 years old, and she
has not had contact with him since. At age 4, Joanne entered foster care along
with her siblings when their mother was unable to care for them, but they
returned home when Joanne was 9. After high school, Joanne met Joe; they
moved in together and had two sons. She and Joe ended their relationship a
little over 3 years ago, and she hasn’t heard from him since. After Joe left,
Joanne became very depressed and was drinking heavily. She reported that
her sons had been removed from her home and put into foster care shortly
after the birth of her youngest child because of a lack of stable housing and
her occasional heavy drinking during pregnancy. Although Joanne’s son was
healthy at birth, all attempts at reunification had failed because of her continued
alcoholism. Her sons were eventually transferred to a preadoptive home
in anticipation of the termination of her parental rights.
Assessment concerns. Joanne’s long history of addiction and depression
coupled with her recent losses raise many areas of concern. Joanne has no
social supports and has few social, economic, and personal resources at this
time. Joanne is readily able to discuss her alcoholism and her depression, but
she is more reticent and less open about the loss of her children. Detoxification
and depression treatment may need to be established before an accurate
assessment of her grief over the termination of her parental rights can be conducted.
Treatment issues. Joanne was at high risk for relapsing, given her numerous
challenges and her lack of social supports. She differed in her ability to
cope and in her ways of dealing with her grief. She reflected on her losses
very differently than birth parents who relinquished voluntarily. Anger at the
child welfare system and at the preadoptive parents was explained as the
result of Joanne’s feeling that her rights were terminated because she is poor.
Self-esteem problems were also prominent given Joanne’s feeling that she
had been publicly called a “bad parent.”
Effective treatment strategies. The therapist admitted Joanne into the
MICA inpatient treatment center and began detox and a thorough program to
treat her substance abuse and depression. Twice-weekly individual sessions
and daily group sessions were conducted during which she worked to cope
with her addiction and explored her depression. Through this exploration,
Joanne expressed fear for her children, and the therapist helped Joanne relate
this fear to her own experiences in foster care as a child. The therapist
addressed Joanne’s fears through a detailed exploration of Joanne’s personal
history in foster care and a realistic appraisal of her sons’current placement.
Joanne was transferred to the outpatient MICA program after her severe
depression stabilized. At this point, Joanne began a 12-step program and
worked with a sponsor while her therapist used cognitive-behavioral strategies
and mindfulness training to help her cope with feelings that she had
denied. Joanne was evaluated for medication and eventually began taking
antidepressants. Vocational counseling was initiated. Thus, the combination
of mental health professionals and a self-help program allowed Joanne to
begin putting her life back together for the first time in many years while honestly
facing the grief over the loss of her sons. The therapist recognized and
acknowledged Joanne’s need to know that her sons were safe and would not
be experiencing what Joanne had as a child, so the therapist supported
Joanne’s decision to contact her sons’ caseworker to get information about
them. The therapist’s understanding and acceptance of Joanne’s anger and
the recognition of the oppression that Joanne experienced as a mother coping
with the struggles of poverty allowed Joanne to feel understood and validated
rather than guilty and defensive.
Joanne’s case reflects the multiple layers of presenting problems experienced
by birth parents who involuntarily relinquish. Joanne’s clinical concerns
(e.g., alcoholism and depression) coupled with the involuntary relinquishment
of her children are complicated counseling issues that require a
careful treatment plan. Given the treatment primacy of Joanne’s suicide
attempt and the interaction of depression and alcoholism, Joanne’s involuntary
relinquishment of her children was an issue to be covered after stabilization
had been achieved. Joanne’s case also reflects several of the common
experiences of birth parents who involuntarily relinquish their children—
psychological distress, guilt, and anger. The adoption-sensitive therapist
(Janus, 1997) in the case study recognized the grief caused by the involuntary
nature of the relinquishment and Joanne’s need for assurance; this postrelinquishment
plan gave Joanne reassurance and the ability to start a future
with support rather than just guilt, anger, and blame.
EARLY POSTRELINQUISHMENT PERIOD
Words will not give expression to the aching within,
the anguish of birthing but not nurturing
of creating but not guiding,
of the giving of life but not the care-giving of life.
Guttman, 1999, p. 32
During the early postrelinquishment period (defined broadly as the first 2
years following relinquishment), the reported effect of relinquishment on
birth parents, but especially birth mothers, varies greatly depending on their
coping skills, support system, and degree of involvement in planning the
adoption—that is, to what degree the birth mother is involved in choosing the
adoptive parents and meeting them.
Clinically, birth mothers tend to report that relinquishment involves a
powerful sense of loss and isolation (A. Brodzinsky, 1990) and that these
feelings accompany both closed adoptions (i.e., traditional adoptions where
no contact or information occurs between birth and adoptive families either
before or after placement) and open adoptions (i.e., the degree to which the
birth mother is involved in choosing the adoptive parents and meeting them)
(Zamostny et al., 2003a). Birth mothers in more open arrangements may
become childlike in their dependence on the adopting parents, only to feel
discarded and betrayed by them once the baby is born. Birth mothers in more
traditional, closed arrangements report more traumatic dreams, sleep disruption,
and a sense that experience is surreal. Physical, hormonal, and relationship
changes bring disruption to the birth mother’s life, and they consistently
report that their hope to be able to “get on with their life” doesn’t reach
fruition (A. Brodzinsky, 1990; Sorosky, Baran, & Pannor, 1976).
Three empirical studies were identified that studied birth mothers during
the initial period following relinquishment. Cushman, Kalmuss, and
Namerow (1993) interviewed 215 adolescent birth mothers from 30 maternity
homes in 13 states in their third trimester of pregnancy and then again 6
to 8 months after delivery. Ninety three percent of the subjects were White,
and the mean age at first interview was 17.9 years. Donnelly and Voydanoff
(1996) interviewed 113 pregnant adolescents from one city in Ohio at birth
and again at 6-, 12-, 18-, and 24-months postpartum. Racial composition of
the sample was not reported. Comparisons were made between those who
placed their children for adoption and those who chose to parent.
McLaughlin et al. (1988) surveyed 146 birth mothers who relinquished or
placed their children with adoptive parents and compared them with 123 adolescent
birth mothers who did not relinquish their children and chose to parent them
from an adoption counseling agency in the Pacific Northwest that
practices open adoption. Racial composition of the samplewas not reported.
In those studies, data collection occurred from 6 months to 7 years after
placement, although focus of the data was on outcomes from 6 months to 2
years after placement. Two of the three studies were longitudinal (Cushman
et al., 1993; Donnelly & Voydanoff, 1996), and one was cross-sectional
(McLaughlin et al., 1988). Two studies used control groups of program participants
who chose to parent (McLaughlin et al., 1988; Donnelly &
Voydanoff, 1996), and one had no control group (Cushman et al., 1993).
Variables studied included self-reported satisfaction (McLaughlin et al.,
1988), grief (Cushman et al., 1993), perceived pressure to relinquish
(Cushman et al., 1993), and depression and self-efficacy, which were measured
on a five-item scale (Donnelly&Voydanoff, 1996). Only Donnelly and
Voydanoff (1996) studied both internal (grief, self-efficacy, satisfaction with
decision) and external (education, religion, SES) variables, although
interaction effects were not analyzed.
The findings indicate a complex combination of differences and similarities
in outcome between mothers who placed their children for adoption and
those who chose to parent. There were no differences between the groups in
school enrollment at 6 months, high school graduation rate, and perceived
quality of life (McLaughlin et al., 1988) nor was there a difference in SES,
religion, self-reported depression, and self-reported self-efficacy. Both
groups reported satisfaction with their decisions 2 years later (Donnelly &
Voydanoff, 1996). However, Cushman et al. (1993), in the only multistate
sample with interview data, found higher reported levels of grief at 6 months
than postpartum and highest levels of grief in birth mothers whose babies
went to foster placement prior to adoptive placement. They also reported that
55% of birth mothers found signing adoption papers to be one of the most difficult
parts of the adoption process, and 9% reported that they felt pressure
from their agency to sign the papers. At 6 months after they gave birth, 38%
of the placer sample reported feeling a lot of grief, and 27% reported feeling
“some” grief. Kalmuss, Namerow, and Bauer (1992), using the same longitudinal
data set, found that relinquishers fared somewhat better than those who
parented on a set of sociodemographic outcomes assessed at 6 months postbirth.
However, they also found that even when controlling for preplacement
variables, relinquishers were less comfortable with the pregnancy resolution
decision than those who parented.
CASE STUDY 1 (Continued)
Course of treatment. Kathleen found herself alternating between numbness
and grief both in the hospital and after returning home. She spent time
with her baby girl in the hospital, and her mother took a few photographs of
the baby with Kathleen and with the adoptive parents before they left the hospital
with their new daughter. Others wanted her to “get on with her life,” but
she sensed that a change had occurred in her thatwouldn’t go away. She tried
to remember details of her baby’s birth and the hours after she was born, but
she found herself unable to, as is common for birth mothers. Kathleen found
that both the physical and emotional changes were overwhelming and that
her feelings would erupt at unpredictable times.
Effective treatment strategies. She worked with both her therapist and her
birth mother support group to express her feelings. She also worked at
accepting and owning her decision, getting past blaming others for her circumstances,
and becoming able to share her story and defend her decision.
Kathleen realized that it was normal to think about her child and discussed
her fantasies with her therapist. She learned through continued reading that
birth parents identified living with the unknown as the most difficult part to
cope with throughout life, and she worked to become more comfortable with
this unknown. Kathleen’s counselor became more didactic during this period
of treatment, teaching her about the stages of grief, and she found comfort in
hearing her feelings echoed in the stories of other birth mothers, both in her
group and from her therapist’s experience.
This case study demonstrates how Kathleen’s counselor allowed her to
face her grief and also avoid the factors suggested by Roles (1989), which
block, delay, or prolong mourning. Based on clinical experience, these factors
are (a) lack of acknowledgement of the loss by society, family, friends,
and professionals; (b) lack of expression of intense feelings; (c) not having a
mental image of the baby as a result of lack of information or not having seen
the baby; (d) preoccupation with the fantasy of reunion in such a way as to
avoid dealing with the loss; (e) preoccupation with searching for something
to fill the gap, to avoid facing painful feelings; (f) belief that having a choice
takes away the right to grieve; (g) self-depreciation and self-blame; (h) pressure
from others to decide on adoption, which makes it difficult to take
responsibility for making a decision; (i) lack of support; (j) numbing through
abuse of alcohol or drugs; and (k) maintaining secrecy and not acknowledging
the loss to oneself or others. The adoption-sensitive counselor’s knowledge
about these factors, the counselor’s educating Kathleen on the grief
reactions common for birth parents, and the counselor’s assistance in normalizing
Kathleen’s anger, loss, and sadness were crucial in effectively
treating her during the postrelinquishment period (Janus, 1997).
Because relinquishment of the parental role is lifelong, it is vital for counselors
to recognize that many postrelinquishment reactions can revisit birth
parents at any point during their lives. Counselors should also be prepared to
address these issues during important transitions in the birth parents’ and the
adoptee’s lives, such as birthdays, holidays, Mother’s Day, and other events
that mark the relationship.
LONG-TERM POSTRELINQUISHMENT
I’ll be folding laundry, . . . and suddenly I’m sixteen again, packing my clothes
for the maternity home. Minutes later, I’ll pull myself into the present and stop
crying. Or, just recently, I was at my son’s school as room mother. They were
fixing macaroni and cheese in the cafeteria. I was no longer in his school, but
back at the [maternity] home where, every Friday,we got macaroni and cheese.
It even smelled the same. These flashbacks happen all the time. I’ll hear an old
song from when Iwas a teenager, and suddenly, I’ll feel the baby kicking me so
hard that I have to massage my ribs, even though I’m not pregnant! Or something
will set me off, like seeing a newborn baby or driving by a hospital, and
the next thing I know, I’m reliving the moment that I left the hospital and came
home. I mean, reliving it. It’s like replaying a tape. The scenes happen again
and again. This happens to me unpredictably, only sometimes—not all the
time. But one flashback occurs pretty often. I’m writing checks—paying the
bills, but instead of signing the checks, I’m suddenly signing relinquishing
papers! It’s embarrassing— I’ve voided more checks that way, by messing up
my name in the middle and ruining the signature before I come back to the
present, control myself, and see what I’m really doing. (Jones, 2000, pp. 178-
179)
Long-term effects of relinquishment on birth mothers fill the clinical literature,
with long-term outcome being defined broadly as more than 2 years
postrelinquishment. The clinical literature (A. Brodzinsky, 1990; Gediman
& Brown, 1991; Guttman, 1999; Jones, 2000; Robinson, 2000; Schaefer,
1991) includes many different personal accounts of birth mothers who experience
lifelong symptoms of depression, anxiety, and post trauma. In this literature,
birth mothers detail ongoing symptoms of grief, isolation, and difficulty
setting aside the experience of relinquishment. They describe what
Fravel et al. (2000) have termed the birth mother’s experience of the “psychological
presence” of the relinquished child. At the same time, some research
has found reports of satisfaction with the relinquishment decision and favorable
outcomes on some socio demographic and social psychological outcomes
4 years after giving birth, in addition to continuing grief and loss
(Namerow, Kalmuss, & Cushman, 1997).
Clinicians report that the birth mothers they see in therapy alternate
between denial of the relinquishment of their child and feelings of continuing
shame, depression, and negative self-image. They feel they carry a serious
secret and that they are unacceptable and unlovable. They report difficulty
attaching to romantic partners and, sometimes, their subsequent children. If
the birth mother has had an open support system, one that she can honestly
communicate within, then these intense emotional sequelae seem to be
reduced. Those in closed adoptions worry if their birth child is alive and safe.
They report recurring dreams about their children and a tendency to wonder
more intensely about their children near birthdays and holidays. If they have
maintained secrecy, they may fear that others will reject them if the adoption
placement is disclosed. Many report losing their sense of faith and spirituality
during this stage.
When considering both the clinical and research literature on long-term
outcomes, it is essential to remember that research tends to be heavily
focused on the birth mothers who continue to struggle with the loss of their
child for years following the relinquishment. This is likely the result of a sample
bias because research participants tend to come for treatment and have
obviously been involved enough in exploring relinquishment to have volunteered
for these research studies. No data were found in either the clinical or
empirical literature on birth parents that suggest that birth parents cope well
with their decision to relinquish, although Namerow et al. (1997) found
some positive outcomes on both sociodemographic and social psychological
variables.
Eight empirical studies were identified. In five of these studies, either clinical
samples or self-selected samples from adoption support groups or organizations
were used, and therefore, these studies have biased samples. However,
clinical descriptions and empirical studies nonetheless provide valuable
information about a hard-to-access population, although their generalizability
should be viewed with caution.
The length of time from relinquishment for individual subjects in the eight
studies varied from less than 5 years (Deykin, Campbell, & Patti, 1984) to more
than 60 years (Carr, 2000). Four of the studies used survey data and three
involved personal interviews with a longitudinal sample of 187 maternityhome
adolescents (Namerow et al., 1997), 20 psychiatric outpatients
(Rynearson, 1982), and a national sample of 163 birth mothers (Fravel et al,
2000). Only two of the six studies used standard instruments exclusively as
part of the data collection (DeSimone, 1996; Winkler & van Keppel, 1984).
Most included both internal and external variables in their design, although
they did not incorporate the interaction of these variables in the analysis (e.g.,
grief was not analyzed by age at relinquishment nor by level of social support).
None of the studies analyzed the data by relinquishment cohort (i.e.,
relinquishments from the 1930s were combined with those from the 1990s),
so comparisons of outcome with adoption practices over the course of time
cannot be assessed. In general, this research found that the emotional effect
of relinquishment can be long lasting and includes confusion, anger, guilt,
and sadness about relinquishing a child for adoption (Winkler&vanKeppel,
1984).
All seven studies implied that at least for a percentage of birth mothers, the
experience of relinquishment had been a trauma in their lives. Unresolved
grief was reported in all studies (Carr, 2000; DeSimone, 1996; Deykin et al.,
1984; Namerow et al., 1997; Rynearson, 1982; Winkler & van Keppel,
1984). Findings indicated a negative effect on future relationships, and three
studies found an increased incidence of secondary infertility (Carr, 2000;
DeSimone, 1996; Deykin et al., 1984).
Condon (1986) studied 20 birth mothers on disability in Australia (mean
years since relinquishment = 21; other demographic data not reported) and
compared them to an age-matched control group. He found that the majority
reported no decrease in feelings of sadness, anger, and guilt since their relinquishment
up to 30 years after relinquishing their child. Condon also
reported that the birth mothers reported dysfunctional relationships with subsequent
children and with men. Rynearson (1982) gathered retrospective
reports of relinquishing experiences through two interviews with 20 female
psychiatric outpatients who had relinquished their first child when they were
15 to 29 years old (although their treatment was for symptoms not identified
with the relinquishment). All birth mothers were White and middle class,
their current age range was 30 to 46 years, and their age at relinquishment
was 15 to 19 years old. All participants felt that the relinquishment had been
externally enforced by parental, social, and altruistic demands. All of the
women had dreaded delivery and remembered labor as a time of loneliness
and painful panic. Each reported that signing the adoption papers was traumatic
and that she left the hospital with lingering questions about what happened
to the baby. Each reported recurring traumatic dreams about relinquishment
and episodes of seeing strangers with babies and wondering if it
was her child. They reported that the relinquishment had affected their future
relationships and parenting. He proposed that relinquishment had put them at
higher risk for future mental health difficulties.
DeSimone (1996) assessed 264 Australian birthmothers who self-selected
from newspaper ads, birth parent organizations, and adoption-related publications.
Mean current age was 45, and mean age at relinquishment was 20
years. Ninety-six percent were Caucasian, 2% Black, and 1% Hispanic. Participants’religions
were listed as 31% Catholic,21% Protestant, 12% Jewish,
20% none, and 14% other. Forty-six percent reported that relinquishment
was “not at all what I wanted.” Thirty-four percent did not have other children.
Higher grief levels were related to (a) feelings of guilt/shame about the
decision to relinquish, (b) the perception of coercion by others into relinquishment,
(c) the lack of opportunity to express feelings about the relinquishment,
and (d) involvement in searching for their relinquished child. No
significant correlation was found between grief levels and lack of social support.
Lower grief levels were related to high satisfaction with current marriage,
more personal achievements, and having gained information about
their child since placement. Carr (2000) found that 37% of the 87 birth mothers
surveyed at national adoption conventions had secondary infertility,
which was higher in this population than the national average. The current
age of the birth parents ranged from 40 to 76 years old, and their average age
at relinquishment was 20.2 years; the racial composition of the sample was
not reported. Emotional pain, including grief, was reported as one consistent
outcome in each of these long-term studies of birth mothers.
Namerow et al. (1997) reported that, in spite of this grief, after 4 years
postbirth, their longitudinal sample of adolescent placers from maternity
homes fared better on external outcomes than parenters. In this sample, 93%
of the birth parents were White, and 7% were African American; their mean
age at placementwas 17.4 years. Specifically, 71% of the parenters had graduated
from high school compared with 91% of the placers, although few
women from either group had continued for a postsecondary degree. At 4
years, 47% of the parenters were employed outside the home versus 70% of
the placers. Focusing on regret regarding their pregnancy resolution decision,
at 4 years, more than 90% of the parenters versus 66% of the placers
reported no regret, and 3% of the parenters versus 10% of the placers
reported a lot of regret. Thus, a more complicated picture emerges as the
sample becomes less clinical.
Using a somewhat different outcome measure of “psychological presence
of the relinquished child,” Fravel et al. (2000) presented findings from interviews
with a national sample of 163 birth mothers (93% Caucasian, 4%
Latina,2%other; mean current age 27 years; mean age at relinquishmentwas
19.3 years) and found that the adopted child remained psychologically present
for them both on special occasions and as they went about their daily
lives. They discussed these findings as an empirical discrediting of the “happily
ever after” myth in which birth mothers are supposed to forget their children
and get on with their lives. The adopted child, in their study,was psychologically
present to some degree in every case.
CASE STUDY 3
Presenting issues. Donna is a 62-year-old African American woman who
came to therapy for depression and anxiety.
Background factors. Donna was raised in an orphanage from the age of 9
along with her brother because her mother was alcoholic and her father was
out of the country in the military. Evidently, this was common practice at that
time and in that locale because Donna knew that others at the orphanage
weren’t “orphans” either but had been brought there by their parents for various
family circumstances. Older boys at the orphanage sexually molested
Donna when she was 11 years old and continued to do so until she ran away at
age 16. Donna married a 25-year-old when she was 18 and had four children
in 5 years. Her husband drank heavily and soon left her abruptly and moved
to another state. Unable to support herself or her children, Donna became
despondent and developed pneumonia. She had no car, no income, and no
social services or other social support. A cousin gave her food, which she
gave to her children, denying herself. She finally sought medical care for herself
(she believed she was going to die) and went along with her physician’s
suggestion to relinquish her children (ages 3, 2, 1, and newborn) for adoption
because she feared they too would end up in the orphanage (and she refused
to allow that for her children). She backed out of relinquishing her youngest
child and only daughter because she was afraid her daughter would be victimized
as she had been. Donna knew the adoptive families of her three sons
and had kept track of two of the three silently throughout their lives. The third
had left the area with his adoptive family when he was a toddler, and Donna
had always feared they had moved to get far away from her. Donna married
again, adopted another daughter herself through social services, and went on
to live a healthy and productive life. However, the sexual abuse and the
trauma of relinquishing her sons tormented her most of her life, and her psychologist
diagnosed her with posttraumatic stress disorder (PTSD).
Assessment concerns. Donna’s insight and judgment appear to be strong
despite her experience of multiple traumas. The accumulation of many years
since the sexual abuse and the relinquishment have allowed her to feel buffered
from their effects, but the PTSD symptoms suggest a 40- to 50-year history
of trauma. Furthermore, Donna’s tracking of her sons’movements suggests
some fixation on the trauma without any apparent resolution to this
point.
Treatment issues. Donna had several major losses that complicated her
PTSD issues—abandonment by her parents, sexual abuse as a child, abandonment
by her husband, poverty and feeling powerless, illness, relinquishment
of her three children, and her secrecy. Treatment included attention to
Donna’s PTSD symptoms and issues but also recognized how closely connected
were the losses and the trauma. Donna’s actions suggested an interest
in search and reunion, and this required careful planning and support.
Effective treatment strategies. Treatment consisted of appropriate protocols
for PTSD and special attention to the loss she experienced as a relinquishing
birth mother. Donna was extremely harsh on herself for this relinquishment,
yet her repetitive reviews of her prerelinquishment situation
always resulted in her reaching the conclusion that relinquishment had been
best for her sons. She wished, however, that she could have placed them
together.Nevertheless, she found it very hard to forgive herself. Her therapist
used journaling, photo reviews, bibliotherapy, and psychoeducation as strategies
for facing this loss. They also used grief strategies such as writing letters
to each of her sons on numerous occasions. Her therapist used her own
knowledge of adoptee development to reassure Donna that the vast majority
of adoptees do quite well (Zamostny et al., 2003a) and gave her reading material
on the birth parent experience (e.g., Jones, 2000) to decrease her feelings
of isolation. Donna eventually decided to contact each birth son and established
caring relationships with two of them; the third preferred no contact,
but she made it clear that shewas open to contact should he ever desire it. Her
birth sons met her daughter and other family members and continually reassured
Donna that they had had good lives and did not harbor resentment
toward her. On the suggestion of Donna’s therapist, Donna’s two birth sons
and her daughters entered family therapy for three sessions where family
dynamics were addressed via family sculpting and other experiential techniques.
Donna’s PTSD symptoms diminished (but did not disappear), but
even with good treatment and appropriate medication, she continued to find it
hard to forgive herself for relinquishing her children. She has, however,
improved in her ability to speak about her traumas and has developed a group
of supportive friends for the first time in her life.
Donna’s case illustrates the lifelong effects that relinquishment can have
on a birth mother.However, in Donna’s case, her own traumatic history combined
with the closed adoptions of her sons to create additional stress reactions,
grief, loss, and intense guilt and remorse. Donna’s psychological treatment
was designed to address the multiple layers of trauma she experienced
and to begin the grieving and self-forgiveness processes that she needed
(Janus, 1997). The treatment provided by Donna’s psychologist reflects the
importance when diagnosing and treating birth parents of understanding the
powerful effects of relinquishment. Had the treating psychologist minimized
the relinquishment of her three sons, Donna’s history of trauma prior to the
relinquishment could have been the focus of treatment, with poor overall
results. The effective use with birth parents of techniques such as journaling,
bibliotherapy, and letter writing requires sensitivity to the grief, loss, guilt,
anger, and trauma that often continue for many years following relinquishment.
The use of family therapy following the search and reunion helped
Donna to better understand the role that relinquishment had in her family
(Reitz & Watson, 1992).
Search and Reunion
Feast, Marwood, Seabrook, and Webb (1994) note that in recent years,
there has been an increase in birth relatives’ initiating searches for the child
relinquished for adoption, although the research is limited to adopteeinitiated
searches. Feast et al. (1994) report that “some birth mothers [search
because they] need to feel reassured that they did the right thing and want to
make certain that their child knows they were very much loved and why they
were adopted” (p. 9).
Research addressing search and reunions has described or categorized the
ensuing relationships that do or do not develop between birth parents and
their relinquished children. Howe and Feast (2001) surveyed adoptees who
had been in reunion with their birth parent(s) an average of 10.6 years (63%
women, 37% men; 93% in matched White same-race placements, 7% of
mixed race and adopted transracially). They found that reunions were characterized
by (a) continued contact and positive evaluation (30%), (b) ceased
contact and positive evaluation (30%), (c) continued contact and mixed or
negative evaluation (30%), and (d) ceased contact and mixed or negative
evaluation (10%). Gladstone and Westhues (1998) surveyed 67 Canadian
adoptees in reunion (mean age 42.5 years, 81% female, 19% male) and identified
seven categories of postreunion relationships that can occur: close
(35%), close but not too close (10%), distant (22%), tense (6%), ambivalent
(14%), searching (8%), and no contact (6%). Factors found to affect the types
of relationships developed included structural factors (geographic distance
and time), interactive factors (boundaries of the relationships, adoptive family’s
support, and birth family’s perceived level of responsiveness), motivating
factors (sense of involvement or pleasure from contact), and the outlook
of birth relatives (close matching on lifestyle, values, and desire regarding
intensity of relationship). Feast et al. (1994) noted, “For the most part,
though, birth parents are very pleased to see their children again” (p. 104).
BIRTH FATHERS
Birth fathers are underrepresented in both the clinical and the research literature.
Perhaps this is because they tend to be less involved in the pregnancy
and less involved in the decision to relinquish than the birth mother. Perhaps
it is because many birth fathers do not see the child prior to relinquishment.
There is very little in the clinical literature about birth fathers, although it is
routine to decry their absence in the literature (Freundlich, 2002; Grotevant,
2003; Zamostny et al., 2003a). Perhaps as the literature expands to include
birth fathers in general and birth fathers who have had contact with their children
in particular, our understanding of their experiences will increase. In
any case, based on current literature, although birth fathers may seem to be
less affected than birth mothers by the relinquishment and adoption of their
children, an accurate assessment of the effect of relinquishment on birth
fathers is difficult given the paucity of empirical investigation with this
population.
Two articles reported research on birth fathers. Deykin, Patti, and Ryan
(1988) surveyed American birth fathers through the international birth parents’
support and advocacy organization known as Concerned United Birthparents
(Concerned United Birthparents [CUB], 2004) and personal networks,
resulting in a sample of 125 (92% White, 2% Black, 5% other; 30%
Catholic, 40% Protestant, 3% Jewish, 13% no religion, 9% unknown; average
age of relinquishment 21 years). They found that the birth fathers’ relationships
with the birth mothers had often continued beyond the relinquishment.
Forty-four percent of these birth fathers reported marrying the child’s
birth mother at some point during their lives, and 25% reported that they were
currently married to the birth mother. They reported that the relinquishment
had an effect on their relationship with the birth mother: 22% negative, 34%
positive, and 44% mixed or none. Most did not see or hold the child prior to
relinquishment, and half were not involved in the adoption process. Birth
fathers who were older and who identified external pressure as a primary reason
behind the adoption were almost five times as likely to be presently
opposed to adoption compared with those who cited their unpreparedness for
fatherhood or the best interest of the child as reasons for relinquishment.
Similarly, Cicchini (1993) did a study of 30 Australian birth fathers who
volunteered in response to articles and public appeals and found that the
majority (66%) had no or minimal say in the adoption. Most remember it as
“a most distressing experience,” and only 17% of the men reported feeling
positive about the experience. A majority of the birth fathers in this sample
had taken active steps to locate their child; however, most had not yet had
reunions. The most often-cited reason for searching was to make sure that
their childwas doing well. The authors concluded that the fathers retained an
emotional and psychological feeling of responsibility for the child and challenged
prevailing assumptions that birth fathers are irresponsible, uncaring,
and uninvolved.
INTERNATIONAL BIRTH PARENTS
My son, I don’t knowhowto begin.You might be grown up when you read this
letter. Yet I would prefer that you didn’t read this letter because I worry about
your pain and shock when you learn the truth about your birth and your
birthmother. I love you. Even though I repeat thesewords over and over, I know
they are not enough. More than saying I love you, I should say I am sorry.My
son! Can you forgive me? When I first sawyou after your birth, itwas as if I had
loved you for a long time. When I looked at you, there were so many things I
wanted to say to you. But the only thing I could do was cry without stopping.
After that, I felt so much guilt because I couldn’t do anything for you and I had
to let you go. I wonder if you can understand that I had to let you go because I
loved you and wanted you to be raised in a better environment. How can I ask
for your understanding and forgiveness? The fact that I gave birth to you and
then placed you with others will leave deep scars on my heart forever. I hope
that you won’t suffer any great hurt because of me, and that this letter won’t
upset you. I want your life to be trouble-free. I will always pray for you. I will
think about you when I look up to the sky because you also look up to the sky. I
feel so sorry that I had to say good-bye to you when you weren’t conscious of
anything, could barely move your hands and feet, and could not yet express
your thoughts. That I was the one to send you away like that leaves me feeling
heartbroken. I hope you will grow up full of life like a pine tree. Always be
happy. Your birthmother. (A Korean birth mother, Dorow, 1999, pp. 80-81)
Research on international birth parents is exceptionally limited despite the
increased visibility of international adoption in America. Media portrayals of
transracial families where international adoption has taken place (e.g., celebrity
international adoptions, print and television commercials, newspaper
and magazine articles, web-based adoption sites), an older population of
“waiting parents,” increased acceptance of single-parent adoptions, and
greater availability of healthy infants internationally have all led to a growing
population of adoptive families who have power, influence, financial
resources, and a thirst for information about the nations from which their
children were adopted. Despite this growing population of internationally
adopting families, very little is actually known about the birth parents from
these countries. The perception of greater permanency in relinquishing internationally
and the implications of relinquishing children to an entirely different
culture are just a few of the issues that arise when considering treating
birth parents who have relinquished internationally.
Johnson, Banghan, and Liyao (1998), in their descriptive work on infant
abandonment in China, found that almost all of the birth parents (n = 237)
were married and that the abandonments were related to government birth
regulations. Relinquishment decisions were most often made by the birth
father (50%), although 40% were made by both birth parents. Eighty-eight
percent of relinquishing families came from rural areas, with their primary
occupation being agriculture. Reasons given for relinquishment were the
children’s gender (90% female), health (86% healthy), birth order (82% of
females not firstborn; no data on males), and gender composition of siblings
(88% of females had no brothers, 93% of females had older sister(s); no data
on males). Relinquished male children comprised those having disabilities
and those born to widowed or unwed mothers.
In Korea, 85% of unwed mothers in a maternity home relinquished their
children (Dorow, 1999). Freundlich (2001) described the typical Korean
birth mother as being very poor, coming from a large family in which she is
the youngest, and lacking family and social support.
These data, although very limited, are at least a beginning of research in
two countries that adopt children to the United States. Birth parents in many
of the other countries, including Latin America and Eastern Europe, are not
represented in the research literature at all. Clearly, research that leads to an
increased understanding of international birth parents in many countries
needs to be done.
Other areas not fully elucidated in the research include the need for understanding
the cultural, political, and social reasons that countries outside the
United States relinquish children and the psychological effect of those reasons
on birth parents. For example, on a visit to South Korea, one of the
authors visited Ae RanWon, a home in Seoul for unwed birth mothers who
were relinquishing their children for adoption both internationally and
domestically. The birth mothers expressed deep regret, sorrow, and shame
for their decision but felt they had few options for survival. Given the social
stigma, poverty, social structure of Korean society, and lack of social support,
the women felt they had no choice but to relinquish their children. Without
the father of the child to affirm paternity and thereby allow the child to be
legally registered, the child would have no status in Korean society and could
not legally attend Korean schools or have a future free from poverty. Furthermore,
unwed, Korean single mothers would face severe moral stigma and
social disenfranchisement from their status (Kim & Davis, 2003).
Political, social, and economic reasons affecting the relinquishment/
abandonment of infants in China should also be further understood. Johnson
et al. (1998) detailed the misunderstandings in China’s infamous “one-child
policy” and explained the gender bias toward female abandonment.
Sons are necessary to continue the patrilineal family line and all it stands for in
the family-centered culture and religious life of rural China. Most important,
sons are permanent members of their father’s family and are still the major
source of support for elderly parents in old age because rural China, outside of
a few wealthy suburban areas, lacks a social security system. Daughters
“marry away” and join their husband’s family, where they are obligated to support
his parents. The main problem with daughters is that they “belong to other
people.” (p. 20)
Johnson et al. (1998) also described the double bind that birth parents face
if they have a child that forces them over their quota of one in urban areas and
two in rural areas (if the first is a girl). Voluntary relinquishment of a child is
illegal and does not exist. If the parents are caught, abandonment of children
carries stiff financial penalties that are similar to fines imposed by the Chinese
government for “over-quota” children (approximately a year’s income).
Thus, families already struggling to survive must choose between more
severe poverty to keep the child and the risk of being caught by abandoning it.
All of these factors, in addition to issues of urban migration, civil unrest, and
other issues, clearly have influenced birth parents’ relinquishment decisions,
but the psychological effect of the relinquishment/abandonment on these
birth parents has yet to be determined. Because of the stigma and the social
and legal ramification in countries such as China and South Korea and the
cultural and economic issues in countries such as Russia, Vietnam, Ukraine,
and Guatemala (Freundlich, 2002), international birth parents may fear making
their presence known to therapists and agencies that assist in placement.
However, when the international birth parents do seek treatment, it is often
for reasons other than relinquishment. Therapists should be aware of the
potential relinquishment issues that may be present among birth parents from
countries where children are relinquished to the United States. Furthermore,
ongoing immigration of individuals from these countries as well as the need
to develop culturally sensitive counseling treatment for diverse individuals
requires that counseling psychologists better and more thoroughly
investigate the counseling and psychological needs of international birth
parents.
Seoul, South Korea
Dear adoptive parents,
How do you do? I am the birth mother of your baby. I don’t know how I can adequately express my thanks to you for raising the child to whom I gave birth. I guess I can only say thank you. I believe you will be good parents. I hope this baby will grow up to be an upright and normal person like others.
The birthfather has the same last name as mine. He was twenty-four, one year older than me. He was a cheerful and sociable man. I thought we truly loved each other but he just up and left me. Although I was happy about my baby when he was first born, I cried every day because I felt sad and guilty at not being able to give happiness to my child. I could hardly bear the thought of having been betrayed by my lover and having to let my first baby go.I would really like to meet my baby someday, but I am afraid that he won’t want to meet me because of his resentment and hatred toward me. Moreover, if meeting him should be a cause of trouble to others, I won’t try to meet him.
Please lead my baby to be a righteous and happy person. I want him to know God. Please love my baby. Thank you very much.
(Dorow, 1999, pp. 81-82)
That letter reflects the cultural climate inKorea and other countries where
single parenthood and birth to an unwed mother is socially unacceptable.
Although therapists in the United States may have limited opportunities to
counsel these individuals, therapists abroad and those who work with other
individuals from the adoption triad would benefit from greater knowledge of
international birth parents. The letter also reflects birth parents’ desire for
reunion with their relinquished children and demonstrates that such reunions
may be possible despite popular belief that birth parents in these countries
will not seek them.
OPENNESS IN ADOPTION FOR BIRTH PARENTS
Over the past 10 years, birth mothers making adoption plans for their children
have increasingly chosen alternatives that include some degree of openness
between themselves and the adopting family. Three studies were identified
as assessing openness and its effect on birth parents (Christian, McRoy,
Grotevant,&Bryant, 1997; Cushman, Kalmuss,&Namerow, 1997; Lauderdale&
Boyle, 1994). In their interviews with 12 birth mothers planning open
adoption versus those planning closed adoption, Lauderdale and Boyle
(1994) reported that those who planned open adoptions showed more attachment
to their unborn babies and were more likely to seek support and prenatal
care, although they experienced more grief in the immediate postadoption
period than mothers with closed adoption plans or bereaved parents. Birth
mothers who planned closed adoption reported nonattachment to their
unborn babies, hid their pregnancies, were less likely to receive prenatal
care, and reported more difficulty accepting the loss of the child after relinquishment.
Christian et al. (1997) studied a national sample of U.S. birth parents from
15 states (N = 75; mean age at relinquishment was 19.5 years; mean current
age is 27.5 years; 97% Caucasian, 3% Mexican American) who placed their
children for adoption between 4 and 12 years ago. Retrospectively, they
found a wide range of grief resolution experiences in each level of openness.
Griefwas coded by trained coders who analyzed tapes of the interviews using
qualitative methods. However, they also found that 4 to 12 years after placing
a child, birth mothers who had ongoing contact with the adoptive family
through either ongoing mediated or fully disclosed adoptions showed better
resolution of grief than birth mothers whose contact had ceased. Furthermore,
they found that those with fully disclosed adoptions also showed better
grief resolution than those who never had contact (confidential adoptions).
Cushman et al. (1997) interviewed those in their longitudinal sample
(Kalmuss et al., 1992) who reflected the shift toward more openness in adoption
(N= 171; 94% White,6%African American). The samplewas limited to
adolescent birth mothers who were maternity home residents at relinquish-
ment and who were reinterviewed 4 years after relinquishment to study the
relationship between openness in adoption and social psychological outcomes
for birth mothers. They found that 69% helped choose the couple who
ultimately adopted their baby and that28% had met the adoptive couple; 62%
had received letters or pictures since the adoption, and 12% had visited or
talked on the phone with the adoptive parents since placement. The most
notable pattern was the association between helping to choose the adoptive
couple prior to relinquishment and positive social psychological outcomes
for birth mothers 4 years later. Those who received letters or pictures
reported significantly lower levels of worry and slightly higher levels of
relief. Visiting the adoptive family or talking with them on the phone
postrelinquishment was strongly associated with lower levels of grief, regret,
and worry and greater feelings of relief and peace regarding the adoption.
Continuing research is needed to assess the specific variants of openness
in adoption and their effects on outcome for birth parents. Early research suggests
that open adoption may be a process that decreases the emergence of
negative symptoms for birth parents. Given how serious and long-term the
psychological effects of relinquishment can be, a model that ameliorates
these effects is greatly needed.
STRUCTURING RESEARCH AND
PRACTICE WITH BIRTH PARENTS
Many authors have stressed that counseling can be of value to birth parents,
both before and after relinquishment (Baden&Steward, 2000; A. Brodzinsky,
1990; Friedlander, 2003; Friedlander et al., 2000; Janus, 1997; Sobol
&Daly, 1992, Zamostny et al., 2003b). They suggest that both clinicians and
researchers need to be informed about adoption so that they can confront
myths within themselves, their clients, and the general public. It has also
been emphasized that clinical themes in adoption overlap with traditional
themes of counseling psychology, such as relationship and attachment processes,
stress and coping skill enhancement, coping with loss and transitions,
and cross-cultural issues. Zamostny et al. (2003a) and O’Brien and Zamostny
(2003) take this further, however, and stress that clinicians and researchers
must not overrely on models that reflect the cultural biases toward the centrality
of blood relations, thereby overpsychopathologizing members of the
adoption triad.
Research and clinical work with birth parents is different than with other
members of the adoption triad. As this review of the literature shows,
although the current body of literature on birth parents could be viewed as
pathology focused, more than 20 years of research has demonstrated that at
least those birth parents who come for treatment or participate in research
experience significant disruption in their lives. It is important that as clinicians
and researchers, we do not attempt to minimize their painful and sometimes
traumatic experiences. The loss experienced by birth parents who
relinquish their child is an actual rather than a socially constructed loss.
At the same time, however, birth parents are probably the most stigmatized
and marginalized members of the adoption triad, sometimes by other
members of the triad themselves. Whether they are upper-middle-class
young women with career aspirations and family support, birth mothers in
the Marshall Islands (South Pacific) whose culture and language do not permit
an understanding of permanent voluntary termination of parental rights
(Roby, 2002), or parents with multiple problems that lead to the involuntary
termination of parental rights, birth parents experience a loss that is nearly
unparalleled in society. When this loss is shrouded in secrecy, the feelings of
shame, stigmatization, and marginalization are increased. The movement
toward the spirit of openness in adoption as well as the actual level of openness
between adoptees, adoptive families, and birth families holds promise
for birth parents’ experience of relinquishment and adoption. The movement
toward openness is further supported by early research with birth parents,
which suggests that open adoption may actually decrease the emergence of
negative symptoms for birth parents. Both the clinical work and the research
undertaken by counseling psychologists must incorporate sensitivity to this
stigmatization, acknowledgement of the actual loss, and careful attention to
birth parents’ attempts to move forward with their lives in a healthy and resilient
manner. Attention also should be given to the need for a model of adoption
with some level of openness that can ameliorate some of the long-term
and serious psychological effects of relinquishment.
PRACTICE IMPLICATIONS FOR
COUNSELING BIRTH PARENTS
The case studies, empirical findings regarding the lifelong trauma associated
with relinquishment, and sizable numbers of birth parents both in the
United States and abroad suggest that helping professionals should be well
prepared to counsel birth parents. However, despite the recognition of the
effect of relinquishment on birth parents and some identification of who
relinquishes, for what reasons, and how that may affect these clients, clinicians
have virtually no empirically validated guidelines for practice with
birth parents.
Clinical practice with birth parents, therefore, has relied on best practices
generated from case studies, theoretical guidelines, and a few treatment pro-
grams developed with sensitivity to adoption-related and relinquishment
issues. The literature reviewed and the cases analyzed here suggest several
techniques and sensitivities to the unique and complex issues that birth parents
face when relinquishing either voluntarily or involuntarily.
Janus (1997) proposed the term adoption-sensitive counseling and proposed
that counselors are in an excellent position to become adoptioncounseling
specialists. A review of the clinical and research literature on
birth parents, drawn from many professional disciplines and countries, leads
to the following suggestions for counseling psychologists working with birth
parents.
• Adoption-sensitive counselors and psychologists are attuned to their own attitudes
and biases about birth parents. These biases include their own feelings
about giving birth, raising children, and relinquishing children; their attitudes
toward the openness continuum in adoption; and the concept of an adoption
kinship network. They are keenly sensitive to issues of ethics—both professional
and adoption-related ethical practices (such as coerced relinquishments)
(Post, 1996).
• Adoption-sensitive counselors and psychologists are always conscious of the
social and cultural factors involved in the lives of birth parents and all members
of the adoption triad (Lee, 2003). These factors include race, culture (including
religious and spiritual beliefs), family dynamics, and socioeconomic status for
birth parents and can be expanded in the case of international birth parents to
include civil unrest, cultural norms, and legal regulation of family size. Adoptionsensitive
counselors and psychologists practice using the APA multicultural
guidelines (APA 2003) and are aware of all adoptions as multicultural, in the
broadest sense of the word.
• Adoption-sensitive counselors and psychologists are aware of the political and
economic aspects of adoption and their effects on birth parents. Zamostny et al.
(2003a) point to the increasing role of commercialization in the adoption process,
and these economic forces have a significant effect on birth parents prior
to relinquishment and beyond. Grotevant (2003) describes advocacy groups
that are calling for reform within the birth parent community such as CUB
(2004) and the American Adoption Congress (2004). Counselors must be
aware of the wide range of political awareness and activism among birth
parents.
• Adoption-sensitive counselors and psychologists are familiar with community
and national resources for birth parents, including support groups, agencies
that have birth parent support programs, online resources (e.g., http://www.
kinnect.org, http://forums.adoption.com), reading material, and search assistance.
Some birth parent specialists believe that adoption agency services present
an inherent conflict of interest because they are also placing children for
adoption. It is incumbent on the counselor to be familiar with agencies in their
communities and refer birth parents carefully to services and organizations
that will advocate for them.
• Adoption-sensitive counselors and psychologists allow birth parents to experience
their loss without minimizing it. They are aware of the seven core issues
of adoption (Silverstein & Kaplan, 1988) and how they affect birth parents, as
we have described .
• Adoption-sensitive counselors and psychologists allow birth parents to experience
their own resiliency and strength, increase their self-esteem, and plan for
their own future. They are aware that not all birth parents share the same experience
and that satisfaction with their relinquishment experience may be positive,
having led to positive outcomes in their own lives.
• Finally, adoption-sensitive counselors and psychologists are aware of the
complexity of each birth parent’s story. Grotevant (2003) points out that adoption
refers to a surprisingly diverse set of family circumstances, and that is certainly
true for birth parents. To avoid overgeneralizing to this heterogeneous
population (Zamostny et al., 2003a), counselors and psychologists working
with birth parents must respect the individuality of birth parents, regardless of
their life circumstances.
CLINICALLY DRIVEN RESEARCH: FUTURE DIRECTIONS
Research on birth parents has been more limited than on other members of
the adoption triad (Freundlich, 2002; Zamostny et al., 2003b). Counseling
psychologists as scientist-practitioners with a lifespan developmental framework
are in an excellent position to expand the research and clinical literature
on birth parents in a way that has important implications for this population.
The current empirical research on birth parents would benefit from attention
to several areas to make it both methodologically sound and clinically
informed.
First, the use of broad, nonclinical samples; standardized instruments;
process-outcome studies; and individual surveys or interview data with less
reliance on retrospective reports and/or self-reports would increase the
generalizability of birth parent research. Because of methodological and
sampling problems, much of the existing literature has limitations in its
applicability to current relinquishing populations, and validity and reliability
have suffered. Both short-term and long-term outcome studies would be
improved by controlling for age at relinquishment and the prerelinquishment
adjustment level of birth parents because the developmental stage and psychological
history at relinquishment could be hypothesized to affect
outcomes.
Birth parent research would also benefit from greater attention to the complexity
of the birth parent experience. Rather than focus solely on self reported
indices of adjustment, birth parent outcomes would be more informative
if they included both internal (e.g., measures of grief, depression,
self-esteem, coping skills, satisfaction, etc.) and external (e.g., SES, educational
level, income, vocational level, etc.) variables. More detailed and
richer depictions of birth parents also can be obtained from the use of
advanced statistical analysis to determine the interaction effects of these variables.
With greater knowledge of the complex experience of birth parents,
more effective treatment interventions, counseling skills, therapeutic techniques,
counseling process concerns, and treatment models can be proposed,
empirically validated, and implemented in counseling and psychology preparation
programs. This research could be built on further by enabling a study,
for example, of the effectiveness of treatment using adoption-sensitive therapy
through training versus therapy without adoption training versus some
other support or intervention. Using case studies as foundations for additional
research, clinical practice would inform ongoing research and allow
the identification of more effective and appropriate treatment methods and
means.
Another major area for future research includes the background, clinical,
and outcome issues for birth parents of color. A greater understanding of the
factors leading to relinquishment for birth parents of color, of the inequities
found in the racial-ethnic distribution of involuntary relinquishment, of
effective treatment strategies for assisting those coping with relinquishment
(voluntary or involuntary), and of their postrelinquishment experiences
would provide very useful treatment and research information. Furthermore,
more research is needed on the experiences of birth parents whose parental
rights have been terminated through the legal system.
The reasons that international birth parents relinquish their children also
need to be assessed, including poverty, civil unrest, financial incentives, and
urban migration. To better serve the needs of international birth parents, the
profoundly intricate and often difficult circumstances, factors, treatment
issues (e.g., stigma of therapy), and outcomes for international birth parents
must be understood. The lifelong effects and outcomes for international birth
parents need to be assessed with no less consideration than for domestic birth
parents.
An area yet to be explored in the birth parent literature involves attention
to relinquishment coercion as an important variable. Specifically, in both voluntary
and involuntary relinquishments, the phenomenological experience
of birth parents on the relinquishment continuum (voluntary to coerced)
should be considered in the design of future research. Empirical designs that
account for this continuum may assist in elucidating possible differential outcomes
based on the degree to which the birth parents felt empowered to make
their own adoption plan.
More research needs to be conducted assessing both the short- and longterm
effects of relinquishment and any subsequent treatment on nonclinical
samples of birth parents. Longitudinal cohort studies of both birth mothers
and birth fathers, including studies of openness and search, would be powerful
additions to the outcome literature. Longitudinal studies of birth parents
would also allow clinicians and researchers to make substantial progress in
their knowledge of the developmental effects of relinquishing. Developmental
issues also could be identified by additional research incorporating health
psychology models about stress and pregnancy outcomes (e.g., Rini et al.,
1999) that would elucidate the effect of the prenatal experience on both birth
mothers and their children. This research would substantially aid our ability
to choose or design effective and appropriate treatment models that account
for the effects of these various dimensions of development.
Multicultural models must be used in the design and implementation of
research with this global population. Models used for understanding oppression,
privilege, identity, and awareness of difference experienced by many
birth parents can help when considering the unique life circumstances that
lead to relinquishment for birth parents.
CONCLUSION
Both the research and clinical literature reviewed on birth parents has
shown that relinquishing a child for adoption is a traumatic experience for
many birth parents, in spite of some positive outcomes shown in more recent
research. The development of research and practice that explicitly uses
trauma as a framework for the study of the birth parent experience also could
add to our understanding. Moving beyond a trauma paradigm, however, to
incorporate an epidemiological stress and coping model for the study of the
birth parent experience and incorporating a multicultural perspective in all
research and practice with birth parents would allow counseling psychologists
to set a powerful agenda for research and practice in the field of adoption
in the 21st century.
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