Once upon a time, I had a life and adoption, while affecting my life and all, was really not part of it. The kool aide was still in my system and I was sleeping in Egypt. I understand it. I functioned and did what I had to do. It’s survival for many birth mothers. Then, about 8 years ago, cable Internet was introduced to my house and the first thing…
I find motherhood to be very repetitious. As in; you repeat the same things over and over again: Did you brush your teeth? Say thank you. Don’t touch that. Close the door. I know you know exactly what I mean. Our ongoing “issues” with Garin were fairly repetitive as well. The same things that caused problems years ago, were still bones of contention. Nothing got solved, it just morphed. Like…
Please, for your own Sanity, begin at Part 1. I have to say that right at the stroke of 13, you could actually see the difference and difficulty that hormones bring on to both budding teens and parents alike. I hardly expected it to be that drastic and true, but it was. Maybe I was hoping that all the horror stories I had heard were wrong, but they are not….
So I had eluded in my Adoption Denial post the trouble that been happening with Garin. I figure that it might be a good exercise in processing to write about the whole situation. Parenting teenagers is hard, I can tell you that. While Max has made it to the over 21 stage, not being the active everyday mom, I don’t have the same reference points with him at all. The…
Hey all..if there is anyone even checking in anymore to read this… I think that I am ready to return, not that I actually ever really left. I mean, that’s the one thing that we should know now about this thing that is named ADOPTION…no matter how hard one might try, you can’t really get away. I tried. I honestly really tried. But it’s like a cancer; you get this…
The post the other day about my broken humerus was a preamble of sorts. I wanted to talk about my arm, but you need to know the situation first. *** It’s almost Mother’s Day, I am PMSing, it’s raining, I just turned 40, and my arm is still busted. Oh, and it really bothered me to figure out that the quantity of time that I have spent with my own…
An important message warning of the risks of adoption. Worth three minutes of your time.
So at 3 o’clock every afternoon, I walk down Wall Street to go pick up the kids from school. Today, being Wednesday, Scarlett gets dropped off at 4:20ish after Brownies, so I was looking forward to some quiet walking time with Tristan. Tristan is in Kindergarten, so his teacher brings the kids for release up to the audorium. Each of the three kindergarden classes have their own door and as…
Quite a few years ago, I gave up on NOT sleeping with the TV on all night. I use to make a huge point of taking the “I-have-no-function-but-for-the-sleep-timer” controller, and using the sleep timer, since Rye HAD to have the TV on to sleep, but I hated to wake up at 3 am to an infomercial. Eventually, I lost both the battle, the clicker and lost the light sleeping that…
I really do not care that you think that I am overstepping my boundries. I personally feel that people who are so desperae for a baby that they troll on message boards and try to exploit women in vunerable circumstances to be predatory and unethical. Pre birth contact is considered coersive.
Of course, you would like to adopt her twins. And while I am sure that it sucks for you to be infertile, my sympathy really ends there. Sometimes in life you do not get what you want. I do not have to think of people like you.. my job is to think about moms who CAN be good mothers, who need help facing a crisis prenancy and perhaps just someone to tell them the truth.
The National Council for Adoption usually has something to say about any adoption issue. One would think they should just based on their name. After all “National Council” makes it sound as if an official governmental appointment was made. That they are the official US stance, made after long thought out meetings by a Council, on all things related to adoption. Alas, that is just a well thought out play on the name made to make one think that is what they are.
In the midst of the conversation, we touched upon that just bad feeling that we both have, that we in a certain way, did this to ourselves. Though she was up here at the time, and I on LI and in NYC, being the same age, getting pregnant at the same time, having boys 5 days apart, it was the same time frame and the same social order that we experienced. The greatest difference is that I went the agency route and she fell in with a private lawyer/ private adoption. And as she said “I did this.. I found them”.
“So did I. I called my agency. I sent myself away”
Pearl S. Buck Uses the Term Birth Mother in 1956 The first known use of the word “birth” as a descriptive and identifiable adjective for a woman who has lost her child to adoption is attributed to Pearl S. Buck in 1956. In the June issue of Women’s Home Companion, Buck wrote a piece called “We Can Free the Children”. Buck, clearly talking about unwed mothers and the feelings of society…
Annual Birthmother / Adopted Child Birthday Blues Today is the last day of the “Max’s Birthday Week..let me live in the past..thank you”. Unfortunately, it is now piggybacking on real PMS and, as always, Thanksgiving blues. Coupled with Holiday Blues Thanksgiving always makes me miss my own mother really, really bad. It is not uncommon for me to be cooking the brussel sprouts or stuffing from her handwritten recipe book…
A Case of Birthmother Blues Sitting here now.. feeling all nasty. I din’t know why. Feeling on edge.. like something is about to happen..got so much to do, but not really… should be doing more, but what? Rye is after me to find some job that I can do one handed… I want to laugh.. every thing I find that is work from home sounds like a pyramid scheme and…