I refused to go crazy this Thanksgiving. I usually make a million things, even if we are going to someone else’ house as I must have :my: stuff. Thanksgiving is intricately tied into to cooking rituals with my mom and making her food, her recipes, form her handwritten cookbook as I have my whole life…well i really like it. Since every years is so the same..I can pretend, in my…
Not a full on wallow, but days of normal with just flashes of internal emotional angst. Welcome to my November. It’ so weird how it hits. And is always so different. You just never know what to expect really. Like Max’s birthday itself..that was Tuesday. Actually, Monday on my way to work I thought about how, 19 years earlier, I was, on that day going to the supermarket and picking…
So Rye calls me today from work to ask me something as that is our main from of communication this week. I am asleep when he goes to work at butt o’clock am and then I go to work before he comes home and he is asleep when I get home..anyway..he mentions to me that Scarlett has seen some election commercial on TV that has her all fired up. Apparently,…
So I was pleasantly surprised this AM to find that my blog piece on the grant money for South Dakota’s adoption awarness training was featured on “Sufingmama Blog Carnival”…lol..I forgot that I even sent it in! “Carnivals” are like a “best of blogging” kind of thing..but what is really, really important is exposure of the truth..so hopefully alot of other people will get to see it!! Of course, now I…
I am plagued with the itchies. I have NO idea what it is. I have never had skin issues before, or allergies, or hives, or anything. I don’t have dry skin and the heating season has not come on us yet so I cannot blame the forces air heat for dying out both my skin and my bank account. Yeah, I had allergies as a kid, but they were all…
DOWN!! At work last night..what should have been a quiet Tuesday night, especially with me working the patio..in October!..last week I had TWO tables all night… exploded in some random busyness. This was, of course, due to the fact that we were on a basic “short” staff..because the owner was having a big party at the catering facility..so sure, Murphy’s law, let’s make everyone want to come to dinner. So…
One of the things that has taken this nation by storm is MySpace. I have the ability to say that I joined a million years ago, when it was new and not “everyone” and their brother was on the dern thing. Our fiend Murry was all about getting Rye and I to get on it, though we thought it was way lame at the time. Now of course, since then,…
Caution: Brain spinning in circles, see below for details. Jumping of my marriage rant of the last post, Suz got it all down in her comment: how do i choose between what is my calling, what i am supposed to do and the person I am supposed to be and my husband who would prefer I fit into a neat little package? i want him by my side, proud of me,…
God, I feel mopey. I have figured out that naturally, like all things in life, I work on a cycle..so great happiness and highs are frequently followed by quiets lows, emotionally, socially, physical, energy wise. And I am not one to want to have all the highs, so I resist any temptation for medical use to make the lows more bearable, I just wad though them, knowing they will pass….
Yes, right now that is all this meeting is to him, but to me, oh so much more. I have had this conversation with him, in my head, hundreds of times. This almost feels like deja vu as I have planned it so much, thought it out, played his responses, planned my perfect wording. No, much more than just old friends we are. I had his baby and gave him away to adoption.
It wasn’t even for my shoes. I don’t get shoes yet. Scarlett starts Kindergarten tomorrow and her feet have decided to grow in the last week, so all those tons of shoes we had..nope. I had to get her something since she has been wearing her cousins “boy shoes” this week…no bueno. Plus Garin, who strats high school ( OMG I have a child in high school ..ugg how did…
Headline: Twelve out of Twelve Scientific Studies find that Relinquishing a Child to Adoption is Harmful to your Health! In the summer of 1999, two certified nurse midwifes published a piece in The Journal of Obstetric, Gynecologic and Neonatal Nursing. They took the twelve existing studies on relinquishing mothers from 1978 to date of publication and grouped the data and compared. Their final conclusion? “The relinquishing mother is at risk…
Beleive it or not, this is not about adoption. I was at work tonight..and at one point I was standing behind, Nadia. I don’t know why, but I suddenly had the urge to just pat her shoulders..her back was to me. It’s a funny place, this resturant, and we all are pretty close to each other..lots of highjinks, teasing, jokes, so this was not any weirdo thing. I didn’t think…
And I bet you did not even realize that I was gone!! But I had a lovely view of this all week: Yes, dear readers..long at last, I, Claud, have done something quite unheard off in my life..I RELAXED! I took a vacation, thanks to the kind offer of KT who has a beach house on Long Beach Island..and I sat on my butt all week! No small feat as…
I received one of those horrible phone calls yesterday afternoon. A friend of Rye’s called for Rye, who was at work, to relay that another close friend of theirs had committed suicide just hours ago. I had to call my husband at work and tell him that Danny had blown his brains out. I knew, upon hearing the message that this would be a huge thing, this force would descend…