I have no use for this thing. Really, he is UNWANTED. So, I am auctioning him off just like a real adoptee baby who needs a real family to love him. I RELINQUISH him, but not playing any games here. Not making this look all pretty with nice bows and rainbows. He goes to the highest bidder. If you want the doll, you got to pay for it.
Often, because I spend much of my time & energy pointing out the negative aspects of adoption, I have been called “anti-adoption”. The very concept of those two words applied together — “anti” and “adoption” — are met with disbelief. But before you are horrified and that title is cast upon my head like a noose, I would like to explain what the words, anti-adoption, mean in my world, You might just find that you agree.
I would caution anyone who is considering trying to be cast, that your story will be used possibly to promote a very untruthful, unicorn rainbow fart version of Adoption. I won’t judge anyone for using them for their free private investigative bit, especially if you are at wits end of a hard search, just don’t trust them. Use them, don’t let them use you!
Now I would assume from your note that you are a Christian woman, so helping out a mother in need would come naturally. I am wondering about how you personally feel about the Tenth Commandment? I tend to want to add a bit to it myself about how thou shall not covet thy neighbors ( or friend’s friend’s cousin’s ) baby either. I note in particular where you write: “I instantly fell in love with him.” and “I did not want to let go of him.”
Do you think that perhaps you DID covet this child and would you consider that breaking God’s law?
It seems that Santa’ Claus’ birthmother, like many birthmothers, she went for what she perceived as “better”, leaving the child originally on the Burgermeister Meisterburger’s front steps. No home study there and we hope he would not have passed the psychological components as he was holding on to just a little bit of anger.
If children are a gift from God then the Birthmother is a regifter!!! Now I don’t know about you, but when you consider adoption to be regifting what God gives you, then I dare say it’s a bit tacky and, again based on my limited churchgoing self, might annoy him when he finds out ( as is unavoidable) that you went and regifted your baby.
Maybe you or she or even some well meaning friends might suggest that your daughter relinquish this baby to adoption and this will, no matter what you might have been lead to believe or what you might read in most publications, will NOT allow her to continue life as planned. By encouraging or supporting your daughter to relinquish her baby to adoption you are, in a most literally, sense helping to destroy the child you now know as your daughter.
Philomena might enlighten folks about adoption “then” but the same audience thinks adoption is all like “Juno” now. It’s one movie depicting one women’s story to find her son stolen by adoption, not the Holy Grail in AdoptionLand.
I was alerted yesterday of a group film discussion in the Sarasota, Florida area surrounding the film “Philomena”. It’s at 7pm at The Unitarian Universalist Church of Sarasota 3975 Fruitville Road, Sarasota, FL lead by an adoptive mother. We need VOICES!
Increasing adoption awareness does not decrease abortions. The alternative to abortion is giving birth. The alternative to adoption is actually parenting your own child. Separate events at separate times even if in the same pregnancy. It’s NOT the “Price is Right” Pregnancy Door Game. The decisions made when facing an unplanned pregnancy do not happen at once and suddenly face three doors to go through parenting, adoption or abortion.
Speak your truth on the Today Show message boards about their week long adoption propaganda and then battle the adoption profiles on Craigslist. Yeah, you are going to earn your #NAAM t shirt!
The intent behind “protecting” a person from the ugly or not so ugly truth about one’s self might be begun as a kindness, but it is still a lie. So even if you love the person you wish to protect, you are betraying their trust and making a decisions for them based on your feelings, not theirs. You are not trusting them enough with knowledge that is theirs, not yours, to withhold. Truth is truth and no amount of wishing can change that.
Why does the adoption middle man sanctify the baby trade? What magic fairy dust does an adoption agency or facilitator or lawyer have that makes it morally acceptable? Why is it OK to give a child away, to relinquish your flesh and blood, to place a child, to abandon a child, to make an adoption plan for a child, to give the “gift” of a child, but not just openly sell the privilege to parenting?
It’s not an example, not a snarky joke, but a real email exchange. I know, I know.. I should leave well enough alone, but sometimes it is like picking a scab. You know it is gross and it’s gonna hurt, but I. Just. Can’t Stop. Lord help me if this one ever gets his hands on a child. I guess this is what adoption has come to in this country.
How many more children need to be sold into slavery? How many more birthmothers must kill themselves over the grief of losing their children? How many more adoptees must kill themselves? How many more adoptive families must fear for their lives? How many more adoptees must dig their own graves, or be killed or go missing os become wards of the state? How many more adoptees must die form not knowing their medical history? How many more fathers must be screwed out of their paternal rights? When are we going to be able to say more than “this is the exception”?
When does it become ENOUGH?