Forced adoption is a drastic step; there aren’t words to express the trauma it causes to all concerned. It surely should be preserved as a last resort, a final call for those cases where children are in grave danger and need a fresh start. In the case of loving parents who also happen to use illegal substances there are almost certainly much more appropriate methods to help, if help is required.
They agreed to send updates (letters and pictures) every 6 months until she turned 18 and kept up with that until about 3 years ago when the updates suddenly stopped. No explanation, no warning, nothing. The updates were being sent to me through CHS so I called the agency and got the run around. This, to me, is one of the most heartless and cruel things that can be done to a Mother and I’m in utter shock that this is actually happening.
WHO: Hudson Valley Adoption Support Group
WHEN: 1st Thursday of every month
WHERE: locations change, please confirm
BONUS: You get to hang out with me!!
Healing Adoption Wounds seminar offers the opportunity to identify deep wounds and challenges, and use creative expression and spiritual practices to foster healing. Created and facilitated by Craig Hyman and Patrick McMahon.
WEBSITE: Inside Out Adoption
I was sitting on the bus, waiting to get home and I was amazed at the what ended up bubbling forth. Not that I am a skeptic on the need for healing, or finding issues, but I had really managed to convince myself that I had control of that volcano of emotion. It is a testament to both Craig and Patrick that the program they are perfecting is a very helpful tool for identifying areas that are still needing some attention. I’m coming home with a new shopping list of things that require further exploration.
It’s not the “gay” that makes adoption lesser, for adoption is an equal opportunity loss provider. Children who are adopted, no matter how wonderful their gay or straight parents are, have already experienced a known harmful trauma; the breakage and separation from their original family. It’s not that they are getting substitute Daddy in place of a substitute mommy, or trading a daddy for a second mommy that is adding to the issues. It’s that the mommy and dada that they were born to have been replaced at all: period.
But that STILL has nothing to do with Marriage Equality. Nothing.
I’ve decided to once again stick my neck out. Because giraffes have such long necks, they always see the “bigger picture” – the bigger picture is that someday no child will have to be separated from their family of origin and no mother feel forced to give up her a child. I’m hoping that those of you who also see the bigger picture will want to become giraffes and join me. If so, think of ways that you can stick out your neck – and help to change an very archaic system.
Sandy has returned to the Good Fight and is taking her place calling for action! Please join her on the Facebook on the ALARM Network group page challenging the sealed records controversy in the United States. Under her guidance the Alarm network is proposing a Federal Mandate based upon the 14th Amendment and here’s what YOU can do to help!
I have told much of my story already, but I know so many of you have a voice and a story to tell too. Maybe you don’t have a blog or don’t feel that you want that exposure, but still have something to say?
Please, feel free to send me your stories and I will post them here. I can give you credit or keep you unknown; whatever works for you… whatever I can to help you tell your story and share your adoption truth.
Inside Out Adoption Comes to the New York City Area!
WHO: Inside Out Adoption
WHEN: Saturday, March 30, 2013 10:00am until 6:00pm
WHERE: Evan B. Donaldson Institute, 128 E. 38th St., New York, NY 10016
WEBSITE: Inside Out Adoption
There are many heart wrenching cases of children wanting to be reunited with their biological parents or relatives wanting to know whether they are truly related to a person they suspect to be their blood relatives. These people simply want and need answers to be able to find that inner peace. The not knowing who you are or where you came from can be a very distressing, life long experience.
WHO: Riverside Community Care After Adoption Consulting and Training and PACT (Pre/Post Adoption Consulting and Training)
WHEN: June 23, and June 24, 2013
WHERE: Provincetown Inn, Provincetown, Massachusetts on Cape Cod
BONUS: Joyce Maguire Pavao
WHO: PACT: Inside Out Adoption and the Mixed Roots Foundation
WHEN: Sunday, March 10, 2013 10:00am until 6:00pm
WHERE:American Red Cross Center, 712 5th Avenue, San Rafael, CA 94901
WEBSITE: Inside Out Adoption
BONUS: Make it an Adoption Weekend! Go to PACT’s Adoption Conference on the Sat and this on Sun!
All these years have passed in a blink of an eye. It really does not seem that long ago. Growing up in Utah; the year is 1988. I am trying hard to remember my son’s birthday. Gasping at the thought I could have forgotten it. This has to be a temporary block. I close my eyes and take a deep breath. Picturing his little plastic wrist band from the hospital neatly placed in a little silver cardboard Nordstrom jewelry box. It is hidden somewhere with my life’s collection of furniture and house hold items in a lonely storage unit. I focus in on it and it comes back to me. I know for sure it was 1988 either March or April. The 18th of April stands out the most. No, I remember it is March 18th 1988. Yes, his Birthday.