First impressions:
Carolyn Skelton, CanWest News Service

Saturday, February 25, 2006
VICTORIA – Until six years ago, Debby Takikawa was a counsellor in
California who ran a family therapy clinic where she helped moms and
dads form healthy bonds with their brand-new babies. Then she decided
to make a 20-minute film for her clients.
She started with the question: “What does it mean to a person to be
‘met’ at the beginning of their life?” and called on her favourite
teachers — Joseph Chilton Pearce and David Chamberlain — for answers.
Soon, she says, the film had taken on a life of its own. With help
from established film editor David Tarleton, the short film turned into
a full-length documentary, and Takikawa closed her counselling practice
to take up filmmaking as a career.
The result, What Babies Want, makes its Canadian premiere in Vancouver
today.
The film was funded by Takikawa’s non-profit organization, Beginnings
Inc., which meant raising money was sometimes a challenge. “We did
everything from fundraising luncheons to yard sales, and then just a
lot of the usual going to all my friends and relations and begging,”
says Takikawa.
It was at one of these fundraising galas that Takikawa met ER star
Noah Wyle and his wife Tracy. After seeing raw footage, Wyle agreed to
narrate the film and record his own thoughts on being a dad, giving the
project a boost.
The film, which has since garnered both a Special Recognition Award at
the Boston International Film Festival and a mention on The Ellen
DeGeneres Show, looks at infant consciousness from the prenatal period
to childbirth and the first months of life.
Takikawa says a baby’s earliest experiences — the ones many parents
think they won’t remember — are imprinted on the deepest structures of
their young brains.
“Babies are conscious and they’re awake and aware and profoundly
affected by their environment and what we do with them, right from the
very beginning of life.”
Early brain development, she says, can affect what kind of person the
child becomes. “If the baby’s environment feels safe to them, they will
make a brain that can go for intelligence, and can go for _expression,”
she says. “If they’re in an environment that feels not so safe for
them, they’re going to tend more toward developing a brain that is a
defensive brain.”
That “defensive brain,” she says, could be linked to learning
disorders, inability to pay attention or even more serious health
problems.
“Our tendency is to see the problem as originating in the child,” she
says. “It is actually much more likely that the child’s behaviour is a
reflection of the adult world and of adult values.”
Takikawa says experiences in the first few months of life, and even in
utero, teach a baby how to feel about the world.
“What we are teaching our little ones when they are born is how to
make contact, how to be in relationships,” she says.
“If babies are picked up when they cry and fed when they’re hungry,
she says, they start off believing the world is a reasonable place.
And what would happen if all babies were welcomed into the world?
According to those interviewed in What Babies Want, it could mean a
happier, less violent place.
Not surprisingly, Takikawa says, the film often provokes panic among
parents who worry they’ve psychologically scarred their children — by
not picking them up when they cry, for example. But she says the film
is meant to be hopeful, not judgmental.
After all, she says, parents face a barrage of conflicting information
that makes for tough choices, and even if they make mistakes, it’s
never too late to mend relationships.
Takikawa is already at work on two similar projects — a book that
spins off the documentary, and a film that looks at prenatal life.
Victoria Times Colonist

BABY DOS AND DON’TS

DO:
– Respect, love and honour your infant as you would a dear friend.
Recognize and acknowledge your infant as a whole being from the start.
– Meet your infant’s needs as much as possible. Your child will learn
to trust you and, by extension, himself.
– Talk to your baby and small children. For example, if you are going
to change a diaper, let the baby know what’s about to happen before you
do it.
– Notice the pace that is most comfortable for your infant, and do
things at their pace as much as possible.
– Watch and observe your infant and see what you can learn. When they
do something amazing, like smiling on their first day of life, believe
in the smile. (It might not be a gas pain. Pain usually makes even the
tiniest of newborns cry.)

DON’T:
– Don’t assume your infant doesn’t understand what’s happening. Infants
are finely tuned to what’s going on around them, and learning all the
time from you and the environment.
– Don’t talk over the infant, especially about experiences that involve
him or her. For example, if you tell the story of the birth, include
your infant by slowing down the story when they start to wave their
arms and breathe faster, and acknowledge that they have a birth
experience too.
– Don’t regularly over-stimulate your infant with crowds, bright lights
and loud noises. A peaceful environment and lots of contact and
connection will help the baby develop a peaceful approach.
– Don’t abandon your baby at night. The baby instinctively knows it’s
not safe to be alone at night.
– Don’t put your baby in front of the TV. The flicker of the screen is
not healthy for brain development.

Ran with fact box “Baby Dos and Don’ts,” which has been appended to
this story.
The Edmonton Journal 2006

and I might add I love Noah Wyle even more…AND he is back on ER tomorrow!!!