It wasn’t even for my shoes. I don’t get shoes yet.

Scarlett starts Kindergarten tomorrow and her feet have decided to grow in the last week, so all those tons of shoes we had..nope. I had to get her something since she has been wearing her cousins “boy shoes” this week…no bueno. Plus Garin, who strats high school ( OMG I have a child in high school ..ugg how did I get so old! Oh wait I have one in college too!) also needed more stuff.

So right before we leave, I have a messgae from Max. Nice chatty, band and college news…rather humerous. Puts me in a good space..and so I go…not thaty I have a choice.

So first we go to the local skatepark store for Garin needs “special” pants. Aparently they now make guys pants with lycra in them so the denim and corderoy has flex. And this is good if you skate, but not so good if you are the mom who must purchase these 70$ jeans. Luckily he understands my thrifty shopping nature and that I would raher spend 70 bucks on 3 pairs, so he has me only get one pair and the three others he had worked for. I still must get hit for overpriced tshirts and a hoodie.
Since when did boys get super uber intense on how their jeans fit and looked? An hour in a store loaded with just teen boys and skateboards and my two “Lets play hide and seek in the clothes racks” devil children while he draged his butt into the fitting room with almost every pair of pants he found. And Scarlett is just slightly hyper for the excitment of Kindergarten. I ended up saying to the kid that worked there,”Please take my money so I can get out of here”.

So onward to the mall. And as we are walking into Target, a couple happens to be walking out and I notice the man, who happens to be..DAVID TULLY. And that means nothing to you….

A bit of background here. DT and I were together for over three and a half years after my first marriage bit the dust.It was one of those perfect read about it in books and see in movies but never in real life relationships. He felt like my other half, being with him was like being with me, but a guy. He wrote me poems, he gave me gifts, he listened to anything and everything, he said I was beautiful, I was smart, brilliant, and supported me in everything I did. It was amazing and I adored him. I felt like all the crap I had endured in life now made sense becasue he was my Karma payback. We talked about our engagement, we picked out the setting, and then on my 30th birthday, he asked me to “be his bride” in a cute french resturant.
And one week later announced to me that he was gay. It was horrible and we talked, we cried and I would have married him anyway if he could promise me to be monogomous. And he did.

And then three days later, he said he felt “pressured” I took off my ring and never saw him again.

To say I was broken hearted would have been an understatement. What hurt me more was not that he was gay, or that my life had changed, or that we would not marry, but that he was just gone…poof!..I lost my best friend..that he couldn’t just talk to me, deal with me at all..that I was just dismissed completely.
Now I live in a relatively small town and the chances of me running into him were pretty great….and it never happened. I have had dreams where it happened, I have gone into situations where I was afraid I *might* see him, I have practiced what I *would *do if I did see him..but nothing prepared me for seeing him as I was walking up to Target.
And what did I do? Nothing. LOL. After eight and a half years…I had barley a heart palpatation, barley an intake of breath. I did exclaim to Garin who remembers him well that “Oh that guys looks like David Tully” and when Garin concurred, I turned to watch him walk away..and yeah, that is his goofy walk. That is him. And I did nothing. Now granted he was presumally with his wife. Yes, you heard right. He did marry in the last year…I do not know what became of his gayness, but at least, I think he is conflicted..signs were there…So I was not going to run after him for any reason.and I didn’t have any urge too….it was SO anti climatic.

And so we bought shoes..and then we went to the mall itself..and I saw it!!! The red star!! Filenes has turned to MACYS!!!!! And so, for the first time in so long…16 yearssince I left Long Island…I HAVE A MACYS!!!! I embrassed the heck out of Garin as I tearfully entered the store and just stood in awe of having a Macys again. He couldn’t believe that I cried, and mocked me, hissing “like 20 people are staring at you”..which does not cause me one iota of concern. It was Macys..it smelled differnt..it smelled like home..it felt different..it sang of my mother. Now, I could do the coveted “One Day sale” with Scarlett and tech her to hunt a bargin like my mom did with me. Now I can teach her to watch the racks and wait for the markdowns. I felt my mother in that store..I felt her pleasure at the thoughts of us shopping together once again. Yes, at the sales it wil be my daughter, myself and I know my mom willbe there too..helping us find our sizes on the clearence racks.
Yeah, people might have though I was crazy walking around with my kids in two going “shush…I am having my Macys moment” and “No, this is not the boring store, this is MACYS..it is much better”..So if you were in Macys today..I was the crazy one. I exclaimed pure joy at the Macys shoe racks…

I still didn’t buy any shoes…for me. Scarlett got two pairs, Tristan got one though he didn’t need any. Garin handed over his wad of earned cash for rediculous jeans.
I want some new shoes..from Macys! When is the sale, mom?