After Finding my Son on Social Media
Into MySpace and the future I went.
And I found..nothing.
No response, no message, no signs, BUT he had added me to his Friends list..so what did it all mean?
Back into chat, we went over what we knew and what I had sent in the first message. It was decided that it was just too cryptic and that he didn’t put it together. After all, on MySpace you expect to get friend requests from random girls and odd notes from people you don’t know. That’s what the place is about. You don’t expect that the woman who gave birth to you will find you.
Making First Contact on My Space
I hemmed and hawed. Could I come right out and say it? “Hi, I am your mother.”
Discussed, debated and drafted, finally I sent out:
Alas, the original also seems to have been lost ( Damn my computer hard drive that failed this year!!! I had them all saved) but that was the gist. I also switched out my picture from my default to the one of him as a baby and myself as I had a feeling that that was the picture of me and him that he had and kept in his drawer as reported by the agency. And then, feeling so very scared, yet excited, and a wee bit bad..I hit send.
The next day was more of the same. Worked the two jobs and tried to be normal.
Holy smokes… mom?
At the end of my shift again, messages from Mom22 on my cell. This time, he had posted a message under my Blog.
I had put “Musings after the Pumpkin Patch” on there and Mom22 had commented:
As she was my monitor of MySpace while I was AFK, she read to me over the phone the first words from my son: “you’re darn right she will. ”
I cried on the way home.
My heart sang my song of motherhood from so long ago.”Mine, mine, my baby, my son, my Max”
I really don’t know how I drove, but I assured her that I would be OK. Somehow I was and repeated the same performance of the night before..in the house, up stairs, log on, get into chat, and into MySpace where the little red light shown next to my “New Messages” and there, in response to my Mysterious note, were the most beautiful lovely three words I have ever read:
Holy smokes…mom?
I copied and pasted and “ran” back into chat. Hit send.
Support During an Adoption Reunion
There must have been over 30 of us in that room that night. All waiting. All so dear to me and so instrumental in my search, in my ability to become a mother who finds her child, in my understanding and preparation for this moment. It was so very great to be able to share. It was not just my moment, or my triumph, or my joy, but belonged to all of us. And that night, as the words hit the screen, more than 30 incredible ladies from all over the world, in all walks of life, all cried tears of joy.
Three words from a boy none of us really knew..and we cried half the night. Holy smokes…mom?
They are the finest words I have ever read, ever heard, ever seen.
And on April 4th 2005, I ended myself imposed exile from my first born son. It was over. My baby was returned to me..a man child, but still my baby in my heart.
It was, without a doubt, beautiful.
wow. that’s awesome, Claud.
Waaah! So wonderful! *sniffles*
oh it makes me get tears too….aw Claud!!!!!
ended the self imposed exile. Great to read. It would have been wonderful for Max too.
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Well, quit with the making me weep. I love it. Holy smokes. That’s just great!
Claud, Every time I read this story, whenever you share it, whether in depth or just the bare details, it makes me tear up. You have a beautiful way of writing–very powerful–and your love for Max just shines through. I’d say that you are blessed to have found him, and I’m sure you are, I’m sure he’s an amazing young man…. but what I really want to say is, I KNOW he is blessed to have you as a mother.
Thank you for sharing your story. It’s truly inspiring, heartbreaking (in a joyous way), and awe-inspiring, all at once.
Wow. I have tears running down my face reading this – just: WOW.
I wish my Mom had done this for me.
Hey Anon,
I wish you mom had too….
I’m sorry..
I’ve read this a few times years back, yet it always makes my heart beat faster.. you are a great writer Claud ! As a “mom” who has had a similar reunion.. it allows me to experience that trip to the moon and back we were able to ride. hugs to you..
gosh.. ffwd now to Max’s 26th birthday story and all the growth this site has seen.. I’m so blessed I rode that ship to the moon and back with all of you in my birthsons reunion.
How little did I know when I wrote on the 10-1-10 that on 10-10-11.. My first son and I would be forever separated by his suicide. He died after I sent him to the same hospital I birthed him in. after a midlife crisis – 35 years later. He left after a consultation, went home the next day and died alone at his own hands.
I was in the company of the same aunt, now 80+ yrs old. I went into labor at her home. 28 years later reunited in her living room. and 35 years later received the news of his death. Each a different home she had moved to. And she was the first person to have seen him when he reunited with our family, 6 days before me. LIFE.. how do we begin to understand it???
Such a wonderful story!
I’m so happy for you and your son. Happy anniversary! 😀
‘My heart sang my song of motherhood from so long ago.’
Beautifully put. My heart sang its inimitable song too when I found my son.
I didn’t know it could sing like that. Sing its amazing song of love.
This post has made me smile and cry. Thank you so much for sharing it.
I love your story. The night I met my son F2F I told him his “birth story” and how my labor had been induced. He said, “It’s because I didn’t want to leave you.” In that second I made up my mind I would never leave him again as long as I live.